Let us presume you are a gent of distinction who does his jet-setting in this, the post-Richard Reid era, and your name is, say, Mohammed Asif (or perhaps it is Ted Kennedy). Or mayhaps you simply cannot abide the increasingly gauche aspects of what was formerly called airport hospitality, such as the tackiness, nay, the sheer unsporting tenor of the boorish requests to doff your footwear at the behest of the Transportation Security Administration. Well, fret not, gentle reader, for the skilled assemblage of fine cobblers at Johnston & Murphy have managed to extract every last ounce of worry from your sky-travel experience with a revolution in foot and flight protection. (Please continue reading this announcement to learn how you can assist our government, with no sacrifice on your part, by purchasing a mere pair of shoes. But to mislabel these shoes mere is tantamount to referring to the Hope Diamond as "an old bauble" or to the Colossus of Rhodes as "a cute little statue.")
Perchance the Caldwell Venetian (pictured above) catches your keen, discriminating eye? Or is the Hopkins Side-Gore more befitting a man of your rarefied tastes? Both these models, and many more lovingly displayed in this caring company's Spring 2005 Catalogue, are vouched for by Messrs. Johnston and Murphy with the following seal (pictured right) digitally affixed in proximity of the appropriate shoe depiction, guaranteeing comfort, safety and convenience to both you, the weary traveler, and your distinguished compatriots traversing the wild blue yonder. So keep this handy tip in the forefront of your mind: The acquisition of just one pair of these finely wrought slip-on shoes (one daren't call footwear that works this hard loafers), available in a vast array of sizes, styles and colors, a few within the reach of even the somewhat common man, strikes a victory blow to skyway terrorists lurking on our airships and jet clippers as well as to those who choose to instead hijack fashion.