WFMU's Beware of the Blog

Six degrees, indeed

The task at hand seemed simple: dig up the dirt on early-80’s SF new wave band, BOB. With the internet at my disposal, I’d just pick up a few brief factoids, report to the blog readers, and then get back to twirling my hair and filing my nails. But oh, the tangents I discovered!

First things first. Delve into this nugget, BOB “The Things That You Do” (MP3). The tune was extracted from a self-titled single released on Dumb Records out of SF in 1980. A decidedly lethargic version of this song also appears on their "Backwards" album that was released on the label 3 years later. I wanted more info, but imagine the search terms I could possibly use in this situation: bob, dumb, San Francisco. Real helpful. Ok, so I was able to find a few useful facts...

Releases by Dumb Records
Ixna “Mi Ne Parolas” (click for Real Audio) Marina La Palma and Jay Cloidt, vocals in Esperanto.
Novak “Oh Farrah” single
The Survivors
Other Music (released on Nth Degree, a Dumb sublabel)

Now it gets really weird. I start searching for BOB’s members: Jim Lively, Dewey Bruse, Margret Blanche... found a few real estate agent name-twins, but still no BOB info. Then, wait, I live in a hole and I recognize this name... Pons Maar! That’s right, holy shit, this dude was not only BOB’s drummer, but also the Lead Wheeler in Return to Oz, the lizard-man in Masters of the Universe, the lead character in the TV show “Dinosaurs” AND the voice of the Noid! His website of art/video clips is here. Maar only appeared as BOB's drummer on the single, and was replaced by Dze Bayles by the time their LP was released.

On a side note, I learned that Return to Oz is apparently some sort of portal to my subconscious (I blamed the film for my childhood nightmares of animated mannequin heads on this very blog a few weeks ago). And thus, my adventure has come full-circle.

What I Did On My Summer Vacation

Or perhaps what you might want to do on yours... This year mark's the 30th anniversary of a movie I never get tired of watching; Steven Spielberg's blockbuster, JAWS. There will be a celebration in Martha's Vineyard, the original filming site - this summer, June 3-5th, called JawsFest '05. Highlights will include an island-wide scavenger hunt of production sites, tours, a JawsFeast (wonder if that features chum and license plates as entrees), trivia contests & other Jaws themed events.The local YMCA will even get in on the action by hosting a swim for kids called "the shark in the pond!" If you're not in the mood to take the trek to Martha's Vineyard, feast your eyes on this, a 30 second animated version of the movie, using bunnies as characters, courtesy of Angry Alien Productions. You'll reminisce for about a second, or thirty. And who knew the shark's name was Bruce?

Discography of Drag Queens

Before the anti-heteronormative hecklers got all "transgendered" on our ass, the term "drag queen" pretty much covered the wild and woolly range of female impersonators who tucked their jewels and camped it up oh so many decades and tubes of Duo Eyelash Adhesive ago. While primarily associated with risque and raunchy stage acts, many also recorded albums that are surprising in range.

Dragstravaganza has lovingly documented over 80 years of these lost audio treasures - from vaudeville recordings by Savoy and Brennan in 1923 to T.C. Jones' spot-on impersonations of Tallulah Bankhead in the '50s to the Pearl Box black drag revue in the '60s to Fist Goodbody's '70s S&M dungeon drama to ex-Bowie paramour Romy Haag's Teutonic disco stylings in the '80s and MUCH more. Sorted alphabetically and by category, the site features loads of album covers, photos, audio samples, links, bios and more.

It Must be the Russians

Inspired by the chatter regarding THE RUSSIANS on this blog lately, I was reminded of this great link to old Russian Propaganda, Entertainment, & Military posters that was sent in by Listener Joe.

Which, in turn, reminded me of the (many) relevant tracks by one of the 20th Century's greatest poets, Attila the Stockbroker, and from his brilliant "Ranting at the Nation" LP, we present the following MP3s of intellectual accompaniment:

(Right click to download)

They Must be Russians

Russians at the Henry Regatta

Russians in the DHSS

Russians in MacDonalds

I first heard Attila on college radio back in the 80s and was immediately transfixed by the clarity of his rants, his often-hilarious demeanor, and what remains a wholly unchallenged sense of smart assed-ness. Some of his more recent works can be had by going here, or for a further taste of what Attila's been up to, here is a droplink to the RealAudio archive of his appearance on Pat Duncan's show from July of 2002.

While we're giving it up for the Russians, let's also pause and reflect on the sexual-hygenically minded brilliance of early 80s po-punk-new-wavers They Must be Russians and their cautionary epic "Don't Try to Cure Yourself" (Right click to download MP3) as well as this RealAudio nugget from WFMU's Listener Hour archives. November 2nd, 2002 edition with your host The White Russian. Сразить, мои друзья!

America's new (Jersey) rock video anthem: "America: We Stand As One"

It's America's rock anthem (music video) for the new century of war without end.

And who better to channel it for us* than a Jersey native who can claim to be "also featured on the Star Trek Trading Cards, which in the trading card world is a high honor."

The Quicktime music video is here (for streaming or download).

Here's the main site.

(Yes, Station Manager Ken included this in a list of wonderful links a few days ago, but, damnit, this song is just too important for our country to not give a spotlight to!)

(*I mean, of course, other than John Ashcroft or Bryce.)

Video game a go-go

The music of Super Mario Brothers perfomed a capella (quicktime). Yep.

via Compfused

Hey, Big Fella

Admittedly, I do like a little height to my men. So do the people behind Giants and Girls dot com , a small site dedicated to big scary dudes and the babes who try to outrun them.

They've got several categories to explore, with my personal favorite being the laboratory section, which features stills from the most traumatizing movie I ever saw as a child, The Brain That Wouldn't Die. Of course, if you're just looking for some straight-up Richard Kiel, you'll want to check out page 4 of the Prehistoric gallery, and page 2 of the Modern gallery.

Here's a related treat: Ted Cassidy (Lurch) narrates the intro to The Incredible Hulk (mp3)

The Happy Listener's Guide To Mind Control

Back in the waning days of the Cold War, I made a cassette compilation of corporate, religious and political propaganda called The Happy Listener's Guide to Mind Control, and I offered it to donating listeners as a fundraising tchotchke for our 1991 fundraiser. Fifteen years, one new world order and countless layers of Orwellianism later, the MP3s for the Happy Listener's Guide found me, so I'm hypnotically compelled to offer the contents up once again, free of charge this time. Thanks to whoever took the time to rip them!

F'ing Example

In case all this FCC stuff has left you wondering just how to use the word fuck properly, here are two examples which showcase it's wide variety.

The first is a song created by North Korea to express their dissatisfaction with the USA for, among other things, stealing a gold medal. Hear the MP3 or view the video for a translation.

Second is a track from H. Jon Benjamin (friend of The Best Show) and is "like fucking perfectly fucking perfect and great and fucking great". Download the MP3 or experience the video.

The New Wave past of Ricky Gervais

On the Office, David Brent was "a friend first, a boss second, probably an entertainer third", but in real life Ricky Gervais is not only a comedy Renaissance Man, but in 1982 a New Romantic as well.

Cleaning Out My Inbox

Since we started up this blog, I'm collecting more links and such than I can possibly deal with. So I've decided to periodically clear out ye olde inbox and post them all list-style. Here goes:

* Stiff, Teutonic Countrified New Wave by Tex Haper, ca. 1984. (Realvideo stream, via Listener Zach.)
* Art by Bob Dodd.
* The Found Footage Festival Preview (Quicktime video)
* Hyperpatriotic Bombast video (about 86 people sent me this link, thanks to all)
* The American Nazi take on The Pope. (Thanks, Bryce, ya fuckin' Nazi!)
* Great Os Mutantes video. (via Bedazzled)
* A homemade Balloon organ, via Listener Erella.
* McDonalds Paying Off Rappers to namecheck Micky Dees. (BBC, via David S.)
* World War Two embroidered patches, many based on Disney.
* Time Travel and Teleportation Coming Soon.
* You Are A Fucking Cunt.
* Silly molecules, via listener Mark.
* Amazing space images from Hubble.
* Luciferian Talk Radio.

Worst. Standup. Ever.

Check out the comic stylings of Aunt Pearl. If you've had plenty of coffee, that is. Her brother Bob is quite the card. Dont miss the tortured warblings of John Daker, either. (wmv movie files for download)

From a public access TV show, which contains still more existential exercises in ennui, all of which can be found here.

Evening Constitutional

Pleasant dreams

[via chiasm]

Norway's Eurovision Entry

Listener John in Oslo, our Scandinavian correspondent laments:

"Here is a picture of "WigWam" who are representing Norway in the 2005 Eurovision Song Contest. These guys are therefore the best we can come up with as a country. It is indeed embarrasing to be a Norwegian, and cool too...

The pastiche is somewhat muffled by the fact that these old men dont have an "agenda", the irony - the irony - it is indeed confusing.

It has never before been SO "Hard to be a Rock'n Roller"... (Gah, it is even misspelled...)"

With A Rebel Yell

While visiting family in South Carolina this past week, I did my usual obsessive radio knob twisting and came upon the only listenable commercial station in Charleston, something called "96 Wave" which plays alt-chart classics for alter kocker new-wavers.  They give a few minutes weekdays to a guy called The Southern Avenger  who mixes Wrestlemania with outlaw politics, American history and a real knowledge of government and policy. While I have a hard time trying to understand why some Southerners seemingly are still holding grudges against us Yankees since 1865 (fyi South: we Northerners are hardly losing sleep about it at this point!) I hafta respect their right to embrace their particular culture which melds wicked charm with gun-totin' lawlessness. The Southern Avenger, with his Confederate flag wrasslin' mask and Unknown Comic leisure suit has some great rants here, which as a Liberal Commie New Yawker I can't say I'm 100% comfortable with across the board but would still recommend to provide insight into the unique voice of America's South.

Better living through science

Levitating frogs (mpeg) and tomatoes (mpeg), brought to you by a group of wacky scientists in the Netherlands (futuristic lair, pictured right). Check out this page for more videos of floating crap, along with a few explanations for how these feats were accomplished. It all boils down to a nifty mega-magnet that produces a maximum field of 20 tesla, which is 400,000 times the earth's magnetic field.

via wobha!

McMother

Found at Stay Free, from a real European McDonald's ad.

Mao-ee Wowee

Now, I’m no art phag, but I do love me some commies. A friend in SF clued me in to Sui Jianguo’s “Sleep of Reason” exhibit that’s happening at the Asian Art Museum over thar. If you look closely, the sleeping Mao is surrounded by armies of plastic dinosaurs (images stolen from this blog). Click here for a candid photo of Marx during a recent sabbatical he took from being dead.

What kind of pinko station is this, anyway?

The Eat “Communist Radio” (MP3)

Real Audio from the WFMU Archives (mostly from Comrade Freedman's show):
Kenny G reads Karl Marx
Red Shadow (The Economics Rock & Roll Band) “Understanding Marx”
Felix Kubin Backed with Quotations from Chairman Mao 
Alabama Three "Mao Tse Tung Said"
“Commie Lies”
Lulu Bellle & Scotty “I’m No Communist”

Clear Channel starts color-coding music ala Dept. of Homeland Security

From the FMQB Radio Industry News website:

In an ongoing effort to clean up its airwaves, Clear Channel has taken to the task of flagging its internal music library with a new color coding system for users with access to the 63,000+ titles located on the Clear Channel Audio Delivery System. The alert system was implemented as a self-preservation maneuver amidst the current climate regarding indecent content by the FCC and to make sure its stations are doing everything possible to prevent the airing of material in songs that would violate the FCC's rules between the non-safe harbor hours of 6 a.m. - 10 p.m. "The songs have not been edited and the flagging is just now getting underway," explained a Clear Channel spokesperson to FMQB. The exercise won't be completed for several months and the spokesperson added that a Clear Channel memo cites a couple of reasons behind it: "The 'radio edit' versions of some songs being supplied by the labels still aren't meeting the FCC's indecency standards; and local program directors and DJs play songs that either aren't on the system and/or upload songs to the system on their own and the company wants to be sure people are paying full attention to what they're airing between 6 a.m. and 10 p.m. If a song has what could be seen as indecent material, the memo says a 'daypart restriction' flag has to be placed on the song." The flags are in the form of color codes: "Blue" songs are "no problem if aired from 6 a.m. to 10 p.m.," while "Yellow" songs "should be reviewed for indecency issues if a PD or air personality wants to air it between 6 a.m. and 10 p.m." "Orange" songs "cannot be played from 6 a.m. to 10 p.m." If "Yellow"' or "Orange" songs are aired, the station's GM and PD will get an e-mail informing them of a possible problem if played outside of safe-harbor hours, but the decision to the air song will remain with the local programming staff. The CCADS library provides the actual audio used at Clear Channel radio stations on a day to day basis.

H is for HOLY SHIT

Mr. T raps about his Mama.

Courtesy of Ifilm.