Wasting Time In My First Life On Second Life

Instead of doing something constructive with my time (like writing for this blog) I have been whittlling away valuable time on the online virtual-reality game Second Life. In this game you create your “second life” physical identity and persona, chat with other people, buy and sell land, build, and take part in, uh, society. Whereas I have always been fascinated with SIMS games and elaborate online virtual-reality gaming in general, I only observed from a distance, knowing the time consuming pull these things have. And well..truth be told, I also found these games and the people who play them to be a bit pathetic. Don’t people have something better to do with their lives?

But I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to sign up when my friend Brendan Danielsson posted pictures of his second life character. He was able to create a creature that resembled the odd people who populate his grotesque paintings and have them interact with real people in a virtual world. Suddenly- this virtual reality gaming racket made a bit more sense. When Brendan posted this video (2 meg .mov file) of his adventures- I was sold.

I immediately created the most grotesque creature that I could by using the basic body and clothes modification option. In my “second life” I was now a pretty lady with a tiny balding pin-head smeared with exaggerated drag queen make-up. I gave myself an enormously fat short torso and long spindly bowed legs. With my allotted virtual money, I bought some knee-high boots and some sexy granny panties. When I was transported to the common area of the game, I immediately made friends with a purple hillbilly character with a yellow mullet and acid wash jeans and a little man spastically running around in silly underwear.

Unfortunately the freaks aren’t out in full force- a few furries, a smurf, some D&D types, goths…nothing too odd that doesn’t have its own little tedious subculture. Mostly, this second life consists of people I actively avoid in real life- boring normals…who decide to create characters dressed in jeans and t-shirt or sad sacks who sit in front of their computer all day and create outfits using virtual money in order to be a “sexy” character they wish they were in real life. When waddling around on the virtual beach, a character approached me and asked, “Why did you choose to look like that?” My only response was, “Why Not?” Most people’s fantasy lives are as boring as their real lives! I want to be a 7-foot tall pinhead drag queen! And as in real life- my second life is filled with derisive laughter, nasty comments and cold shoulders! Perhaps IF THESE PATHETIC SLOBS KNEW HOW BEAUTIFUL I WAS IN REAL LIFE they wouldn’t be treating me so poorly! Maybe with A LOT MORE TIME AND EFFORT I can find some like-minded cretins…but really- why bother? Who has the time?

That being said…I’ll, ummmm, er…well….I’ll see you in Second Life.

Comments

[poodlepoodle]

Wait... You're Nornna????

[andrew jones]

Yeah, when I actually got around to figuring how to move and talk to people in SL I had a kinda similar experience. I meet primarily what seemed like teenage girls obessed with creating their "perfect avatars" etc. The real fun doesn't come in till you stumble across a role playing domination and submission group reenacting some eleaborate black ritual from the french aristoracy while talking about their linux partition etc.

[macropus]

Ho boy. This nails it on the head. Yawn. Lots of boring poseurs, with equally boring fantasies - oh, and enough useless $#!+ to go broke on. Where's the fun in seeing endless stalls of bling to buy for your avatar? Whee.

I have a furry avatar there, but, I'm not one of -those- creepy ones you've heard about. I'm represented by a quiet, shy fae macropod there (one of only two I'm aware of). To be honest though, she's got little to do there other than wander, and boggle at the sheer idiocy she encounters for the most part. Whee, again.

I got on Second Life three months ago, at the insistence of a friend. I think I can conclude that it's just not all that interesting for the most part. Not to mention that it burns clock cycles like an H2 does dead dinos, and makes my video card beg, "No mas, no mas!" after an hour or so. It's just fancy window dressing for what I can do on a MUCK, or IRC, with less strain on the ol' laptop.

Great article, though. Thanks for sharing. :)

- Roofae Fluffy on SL (with slight variants thereof elsewhere. Your Mileage May Vary, blah, blah, blah)

[Blake Salsman]

Really boring fun.