Banana fana fo uck. The Sex Name Fabricator creates the name for a sex act by randomly combining a nationality with a kitchen utensil. Bosnian meat cleaver, Malaysian meat grinder...I'm partial to the ones with meat in them. Designed by Aesthetic Apparatus and Listener Dan. See, Listeners can get off their asses and do something useless.
Big questions. Why would Nature make the world's smallest dog so damned small? Scientists say it's something about dog DNA. Next question: Why would someone name the world's smallest dog Dancer? Like that dog isn't already going to get its ass kicked on the playground. Brandy, another little dog with big dreams, is a fine girl, but she's no Dancer.
Before Dancer we had Tiny Pinocchio. "However she is not alive anymore where her owner found her dead after overeating herself to death." Or something like that. All I know is this dog looks like it ate its own nose. Read the sad but totally true tale of Tiny Pinocchio.
I would tell you about the World's Smallest Police Dog but it's boring. "She watches everybody comes in the room," Sheriff Dept. Deputy Carrie Jericho said. "Her ears perk up and she watches who's coming in." Like I said, booooring.
After the jump: the deal with the freaky little horse (yes, that's a horse), beer-drinking cats, quick change artists, and it's all safe for work.
Since you asked, the World's Smallest Cat is Mr. Peebles, who is actually in the Guiness Book of World Records, apparently after having drunk the world's smallest glass of Guiness. That stuff will stunt your growth. Though teeny Heed, sticking to a strict Pepsi diet, is making his move.
My little pony. The World's Smallest Horse is Thumbelina, a miniature horse with dwarfism. I don't want to say anything mean about her because she dominates normal stallions. And also I'm scared because her poops are regular-sized.
The World's Tallest Man is now The World's Tallest Married Man. Sigh. Scratch another dude off my eligible bachelor list.
The World's Fastest Undresser may not be his official title, but this guy can take off his clothes in 7 seconds. Yay! Add another dude to my eligible bachelor list.
World's largest underwear (scroll down).
I think I'm going to kill myself now.
Send smut and internet contraptions to amanda at wfmu dot org.