An intrepid band of so-called "film preservationists" attempt to recreate and restore a long-lost medium, derisively referred to as "flatties." These cinematic artifacts are neither virtual nor immersive, but involve documented action embedded on sequential frames of transparent strips of photographic stock. Historians claim that these relics served as "entertainment" vehicles generations ago.
"What survived, survived piecemeal," according to researcher Sky Hepburn. "We work with a variety of binary source materials which are themselves re-encodings of long-obsolete single-perspective external media. Sometimes we have just one channel of information to work with, so we can only approximate the original experience."
Hepburn described the difficulty of trying to reconstruct an artifact from 1968 entitled Planet of the Apes: “We have the picture element and a commentary track by Roddy McDowell, but all attempts to recreate the original dialogue through lip reading have come up empty."
Hepburn also explains the mysterious process known as "maltinization."
Didn't you guys read the title of the post? Oops sorry, ruined more funny comments to come.
Posted by: XNet | August 14, 2007 at 06:11 PM
SPOILER!
Posted by: Irwin Chusid | August 14, 2007 at 06:45 PM
Sure, but did they ever figure out what to do about Adam Sandler?
Posted by: Parq | August 14, 2007 at 07:29 PM
We apes would never wear such ridiculous outfits. In the old flattie the human is asking for "yogurty crepes," their favorite feed.
Posted by: Vic Perry | August 14, 2007 at 07:39 PM
Spoiler? Even the blogger gives up the ghost by referencing "film". Strong start, weak finish. Goddam dirty apes.
Does Maltinization result in something you can lick?
Posted by: noisejoke | August 15, 2007 at 01:12 PM