Yesterday was an even darker day in America than the day the pilot episode of "W*A*L*T*E*R" got pre-empted by the '84 Democratic National Convention. Uh huh, the "Friday the 13th" remake. (On the flip side it was Arsenio Hall's 54th birthday, too, so yay for relevance!) I wish to usher in this auspicious event the only way I feel it can be properly ushered: laughably and comically. On July 28, 1989, Arsenio sat down with Kane Hod...oops, Jason on his late night talk show for world television's first intimate and personal glimpse into Camp Crystal Lake's own machete-lunging, serial-disemboweling, "how-in-thee-hell-did-he-just-do-that?"-superliminal-time-space-continuum-accelerating son of a BITCH:
You could've cut the silence in that interview with a...never mind.