After drowning in year end wrap ups and best of lists I yearned for the sweet kiss of the near future, the great frontier, no looking back but only forward. We all know 2011 is going to rock, but because I hate surprises I asked some people what they thought was coming next. Here is what they reported back to me. Deuteronomy 18:10-13 be damned, this is compelling internet, yes-sir-ee-bob.
Don't agree with a prediction, or have your own? Hit the comments section, I love hearing from you.
Jeff Conklin - Avant Ghetto - I predict hipsters now into witchhouse will resurrect the cross colors clothing line, wear leather Africa necklaces and proclaim Bell, Biv, Devoe to be the best musical act ever. possibly wearing their jeans backwards.
John Fell Ryan - Excepter - a resurgence of techno orthodoxy, carnivorous visions
Brian Turner - WFMU - Waxtrax revival continues, Revolting Cocks play You Goddamn Son of a Bitch at Don't Look Back.
Nate Rulli - Abandon Ship Records - Scott Stapp comes out of the closet -Eddie Vedder commits suicide -The Mets win the World Series!
JEA - Gift Tapes - 3D blockbusters will no longer fulfill the user's desire for pain, causing a rise in the value of Merzbow tapes and associated magnetic artifacts. Automated and random processes will become more commonplace in the creation of sound, mimicking the way human-computers collect information; cultural identity scattering as auditory meditation and reflection. Increasing irregular weather patterns will affect the composer's desire for cohesive compositional structures, potentially diminishing the listener's desire for the composer. Exploratory systems of replicating stream-of-consciousness creation methods may give rise to a resurgence of free improvisation. The attempt to synthesize our new 'nature' will require complex electronic instrumentation. At some point, a group of scientists will discover the God Particle. I think it should be a good year for experimental music.
Matthew Kimmel - Acid Marshmallow - There will be very few advances in pasta sauce technology (the sauce heyday is long gone) - on a personal tip... I'll completely stop drinking from reusable plastic cups, one time plastic or glass only, glass I can handle if it has been washed, but plastic... no way. Also I predict... neon marshmallow fest II
Adam Egypt Mortimer - Sinatoro - it will all be faster
Carly Ptak - Nautical Almanac - My prediction for 2011 is that more and more people will become disenchanted with our material world and look inside themselves with honesty and forgiveness. Actions will be even more based in love and compassion. This will lead to a wider acceptance and involvement with other dimensions and new realizations will disseminated on a wide scale.
John Elliot - Outer Space - I predict 80s rehash will turn to 90s rehash, I predict that the sky will fall, I predict it will reign cats and dogs.
Etienne Duguay - Predator Vision - As 2012 comes around the bend the digital mainframe will fuse with the human collective conscious. Immortality achieved through digital consciousness, biological synthesis on a molecular level. Inside the grid the world will become flat, the band Cars & Girls debut will be announced.
Wm. Berger - My Castle of Quiet - The quality of life in this country will continue to degenerate, and no law or change that benefits the populace will be passed on Capitol Hill. This will all be blamed on Obama, leading to a Republican White House in 2012. In 2011, our time as a nation will be divided between buying Prison Tatt releases, and preparing for President Palin.
Jeff Donaldson - Notendo - I PREDICT IMBEDDED OLED TECHNOLOGY WILL BECOME THE NEXT BIG FASHION TREND
Max Eisenberg - DJ Dog Dick - In 2011 DJ Dog Dick will hit the talk show circuit!
Wyatt Howland - Skin Graft - I predict more poverty, substance abuse, arguments, weight gain from a sedentary lifestyle, black noise, negativity, and an overall shitty time.
Josh Millrod - Bob Marley Hats - Bob Marley Resurrection, Ghop will consume more than $10,000 worth of weed, Facebook will make profiles for pets, Barack Obama will turn America into a socialist welfare state, & Bill will get laid.
Joshua Slusher - Outer Spaceways, Inc - Witch House becomes the new Emo.
Jesse DeRosa - Baked Tapes - _______ shifts to _______, somehow people still buy his records. Pendu signs cast of Jersey Shore to release Witchhouse album. Turns out Slasher Risk is actually prepping for huge interstate armored truck heist. Grasshopper dies tragically at Cannabis Cup. Details hazy. Dave Germano buys a VW bus to follow SR on tour from city to city and sell T-shirts out of his trunk. Killed in cross-fire at first bank heist. The living room in Bill's house snaps in half, leaving whole side of house exposed. Josh Slusher wins lottery, becomes billionaire. Burns thru all money before Labor Day. By Q4 things are back to normal. Neil Vendrick signs to Tommy Boy.
Bob Bellerue - Anarchymoon - Slasher Risk goes sustainable-corporate and generates own bio-diesel oil with belgian fries and falafal truck. High School Confidential signs to Kranky, Wm. Berger sex tape Grey Market = the next Columbine or Dan Deacon.
Donald Miller - Borbetomagus -This coming October/Halloween season, you will be able to purchase in any of your local chain pharmacy or grocery stores, for $1.99 or less, one to five variations of a home studio, copyright-compromised “spooky sounds” CD that will beat the livin’ entrails outta 99% of the crap hailed as genius and/or made the the cover of “The Wire”, in this year 2011 ev.
Criswell predicts!!! (really Donald Miller again) that Edward D. Wood, Jr., will NOT make a single movie this year.
Speaking of Criswell & Ed Wood, Jr, dig the end of Plan 9 From Outer Space -
Edan Wilbur - Death By Audio - I predict that in 2011 man will truly conquer beast in Fox's new reality show, Human vs Wild Animal.
Ben Billington - Tiger Hatchery - I predict that the human race will realize the Mayan prophecy of the world ending on 12/21/2012 is indeed true, leading to an amazing year of sex, drugs, and rock 'n' roll.
So yeah, that's it. Happy New Year everyone.