WFMU's Beware of the Blog

Australian New Wave, Italian Horror Metal, Madagascarian Doo Wop and French Hair Metal

Laugh if you want, but I’ve watched this Time Bandits video at least a hundred times and have taken copious notes.  Notice the lyric, "love is for the ones," as if only a group as exclusive as these models can really love.  Don't you want to love like these beautiful people do?  I'm not kidding, I find this video totally alluring.   You don't?  sorry... Other Aussie new wavers that have taken up too much of my time: Dugites, Eurogliders, James Freud...  On the right, Italy’s Death SS were not Nazis, but singer Steve Sylvester did lead a satanic sect at the time of this video's filming.  You know that feeling when you’ve watched TV for so long that your stomach hurts? Ugh…

I’ve also been spending too much time looking through archives of Mexican Doo Wop, although every one of those videos gets topped by Madagascar’s Les Surfs.  Mexican doo wop that has taken up too much of my time: Los Hooligans, Manolo Munoz, Los Hitters.  On the right is the fruit of too much time with French Heavy Metal.  A lot of music videos from this era are much more ridiculous, including many of Warning’s other music videos -  I chose this one because the song is a almost entirely unironic blast of Sabotage-era Sabbath meets Iron Maiden.  Runners up include: Dum Dum Bullet, Nightmare, Trust, Speed Queen.

It's Fun To Stare At The N-M-K-Y!!!

From DJ HotRod:

Who said Nokia was the best thing to come out of Finland? The lead singer looks like Fred Armisen starring in an SNL skit. Brilliant.

Gregorius "YMCA/NMKY" (Finnish cover):

Weird World, Pt. 2

The Club makes you Tan.  Or does the Tan make you Club?

Via Barstool Sports.  More club shots available at a lot of places.  Thanks again, Mike.

"Fuck Everything But tATu"

I now understand the divine wisdom behind Mischa Barton's premature departure from The OC. Clearly, she was called upon by a higher power to make the greatest Cheesy Euro Disco movie of all time - a film that will surely be a contender for the best terrible music flick ever - Finding t.A.T.u.

It's the tale of two teenage girls who fall in love after meeting at a t.A.T.u concert and are swept into a dangerous world of obsession, drug abuse and murder - kind of  24 Hour Party People meets Eastern Promises.

A short was leaked onto the internet today, so who am I to stand in the way of two faux Russian lesbians and their viral marketing campaign:

If the sight of Mischa Barton navigating her way among hanging slabs of meat in a livestock factory isn't enough to make you count the days till it's release, then just ponder the immortal words that one of the protagonists types into her blackberry:

"Fuck everything but t.A.T.u. They're nihilists. Beautiful nihilists."

Just think. They came this close to defeating Vladimir Putin for the presidency of Russia.

thanks Doron and Idolator!

Previously: download the tATu How Soon is Now Remix: MP3

The Viking of 6th Avenue

No, I haven't read it yet — it arrived in the mail yesterday — but Robert Scotto's long-awaited biography of the idiosyncratic music visionary Louis Hardin (1916-1999), better known as "Moondog," is now officially between covers. Subtitled The Viking of 6th Avenue, the book includes a 28-track CD. Publisher Process Media's site says the book's coming out in October, but Amazon.com, which lists the book with a November pub date, has it in stock.

Scotto appeared on my program twice in commemoration of Moondog's birthday. Hear the interviews and music, and view the playlists:

May 23, 2007

May 24, 2006

A What from Norway?

Here's a fun game to play with experimental musicians: degrees of separation from John Zorn.  Today's contestant is Andrej Nebb.  Let's see, Nebb's off/on collaborative partner in Holy Toy was Lars Pedersen, whose brainchild When has releases on Chris Cutler's ReR label.  Cutler's first band was Henry Cow, which also included Fred Frith, who was in Naked City with John Zorn.  Four degrees, not bad I guess.

Andrej Nebb hooked up with Pedersen for the electronic-krautty Holy Toy only after having fronted post-punkier De Press; Nebb established himself as a fixture in Oslo's music scene in the early 80s.  The Block To Block album in particular is solid.  Get a taste with On Top (MP3).  To be honest, sometimes Nebb's vocals can be pretty painful - although sometimes his missed notes and broken English can also be very charming.

Holy Toy, like De Press, put out a lot of records of varying quality, some of it very good.  For my money, their best material is the stuff written only by Nebb and Pedersen without any others to clog the creative process.  Some nice person posted a very good music video of the power duo performing in Holy Toy's prime, around '85.  Nebb's keyboards are too low in the mix, but thankfully Pedersen makes up for it with awesome drumming reminiscent of Lark's Tongue era King Crimson.

 

Nebb must be a pretty big egotist...late in the video, you can see that his name is embroidered on the back of his jacket.

(Five more mp3s follow...)

Verka Serduchka's Near Victory for Cheesy Eurodisco at Eurovision 2007 (video)

It was the global triumph of Cheesy Euro-Disco that was not to be. If not for Serbian Nerdthrob Marija Serifovic's first place finish at Eurovision 2007, Ukrainian cross-dresser Verka Serduchka would have come in first place for her performance of Dancing Lasha Tumbai:

 

This, of course, is not the Eurovision performance, which can be seen here. But this is same song which almost put Cheesy Euro-Disco on the map, and the video contains many of the requisite Cheesy Euro-Disco tropes, such as outer space sets, metallic suits and absurd choreography.

Thanks to youtuber xwsqza777

Dancing Fools

Few rock musicians had more integrity than Frank Zappa. Uncompromising, non-conformist, prolific - FZ may have appeared on an episode of Miami Vice as a drug dealer, but he never sold out. And then suddenly... this footage surfaces!

Roots of Cheesy Euro Disco: Yes Sir, I Can Boogie

Few words in the English language resonate as globally as the word "boogie," especially if you add a few extra o's to it, as in boooogie. Sure, there are other words and phrases with even more inter-lingual appeal  - "fuck," "baby," and that standby of international servitude: "no problem." But "boogie" ranks up there, thanks in no small part to the international hit record by Baccara, Yes Sir, I Can Boogie. The musical tale of a one-night stand between an elegant lady who needs to hear "that certain song" and her inscrutable paramour "meester," Yes Sir, I Can Boogie is irresistible in its breathy awfulness. It was a hit all over the world (except for the US), and sold 16 million copies worldwide in 1977, more copies than any all-female group had ever sold before.

I've periodically searched online for videos of this song, and finding only the stiffly choreographed original versions by Baccara, I've always been disappointed. Until now:

The three Frauleins above left are not Baccara, but the German-cum Vegas group, The Jacob Sisters. They're inter-cut with the original Baccara, consisting of Spaniards Mayte Mateos and Maria Mendiola. On the right, it's a German version by that crazy Finn, M.A. Numminen. Here's an MP3 of Numminen's version: Download MP3

 

On the left we have Goldfrapp doing their version which they retitled Yes Sir (from their EP Twist Single), and on the right, it's DJ ChrissyLou with her psychedelic karaoke version.

Vitas: A Minnie Riperton for The Aughts (video)

To that rarefied group of vocalists (think Mariah Carey, Minnie Ripperton, Klaus Nomi) who can send their pipes up into "whistle range," please welcome the Latvian-born Russian singer, Vitas. A congressional page who I am on extremely cordial terms with introduced me to his work. The best introduction to Vitas' oeuvre would be his breakout song from 2000, Opera 2: download mpeg video (6 megs), or youtube it here. This is a live version of Opera 2, complete with a string section decked out in burkas, and a chorus of women whose only official role seems to be to writhe and sweat whenever Vitas hits that high F note. A Russian MTV video of this same song (youtube link) is nowhere near as entertaining, but it does include thrilling special effects of Vitas using his awesome talents to break glass and generally wreak havoc.

Vitas' own website reveals his divine providence:

Oh, my God!!! Bless this lovely boy! Give him Patience, Gladness, hearty Light, Inspiration and Love... Each his work like a new pearl appears in our hearts with tears of gladness as heaven-sent!!!!! You want to hear him again and again,... infinitely! I breathe this voice, plunging into thin ethereal world, but I cannot get to know this sweet secret of life... As a crystal starts to play with different colors of a rainbow, when the beam of the sun falls to it, as unsurpassed pure voice of Vitas plays and sparkles with all shades in a beam of divine light. This voice both flows with tenderness from the depth of the soul,and shrilly fills with itself all space...

Not all of Vitas' videos are as exciting as Opera 2, but one recent song, Smile, does include more requisite reaching for the heavens while trilling all the way into non-castrated falsetto ecstasy: youtube link.

But don't think you can pigeonhole Vitas! He's not always clenching the heavens as he reaches for the high notes - far from it. In this live performance of his song Blessed Guru, he works out on his low register, while playing the role of an android from the future who visits the Neanderthals, on a stage set highly reminiscent of Spinal Tap's Stone Henge: download mpeg video (20 megs), or youtube it.

Norwegian Country (MP3s)

Norway is very much like Texas. Different languages, but plenty of oil. Texas, the lone star, and Norway - not a member of European Union. One thing that stands out, is the love of Country and Western, and at one of the numerous festivals, you bet it's going to be Helt Texas (totally Texas = crazy).

Country music in Norway goes way back, and Scandinavians in general are not giving up their traditions easily, listen to the; Gamalost-song (lyrics) (mp3). Despite being subject to ridicule from the intellectual left wing, American culture flourishes (YouTube) in Norway, to the extent of being even more pronounced than in the US of A itself... 

I will try to shed some light on Norwegian Americana with some soundbits, but first some - Norwegian rappers: Tommy Tee - Paperboys - Karpe Diem (YouTube) - and some wannabees - 50 öre (YouTube). Just as Norwegian as corn on the cob.

C&W examples: Bjøro Håland's song I Love Norwegian Country (mp3) (lyrics) is an "over there" story about a trip to Nashville. As with the rap-videos above, I always get a kick out of native babbeling intercepted by foreign phrasing. Hasta La Vista Elvis Presley (mp3) by Arnie Norse is a glimpse into C&W-outsider music.
Going to Nashville is imperative! If you can't go, then dream of it; En Drøm om Nashville (mp3) by Heidi Hauge. A couple of covers by grand old lady Lillian Askeland, Tennessee Waltz (mp3) Billy Boy (mp3).

Teddy Nelson (born Terje Nilsen) was awarded "International Star of the Year" in both '81 and '82 by the Grand Ole Opry in - yes - Nashville. His Diggy Liggy (mp3) - a typical joie-de vivre song was a massive hit! Before his death in '92, he cut a record with Skeeter Davies...

I love Norwegian country (the rap-version) (YouTube)

Atari Mania continues...plus more Eurovision

Just a couple of quickie updates on previous posts.

Atari
First of all, thanks for all the comments on the Atari Music post. I was hoping it would get some more video game minded folks to post their favorites, which it did. But best of all, it inspired blog reader Gavin Richmond to make his own video for Little Brother's Atari 2600 song, using vintage Atari commercials. Download Quicktime (15.5mb) or GoogleVideo. Check out Gavin's blog for more fun videos, a future one of which will feature people doing the robot for a late 80s electronic dance band that are somehow still around.

Oh, and that photo to the left? Total BS. But it amused the heck out of me none-the-less, which is exactly what the comedy of the Van Gogh Gogh's is supposed to do. You can read the whole story of Atari 8 tracks and other fake 2600 products here.

Eurovision
Back in May, Lukas posted about the glorious history of the Eurovision song contest, and the insanely catchy 1975 winners, Teach-In. Well, browsing around today I discovered this crazed Eurovision fan from Tel Aviv who has posted some 400 videos on YouTube of contestants from the 1950s through today.

Got a few hours to kill? There are so many gems in there, especially during the 70s and 80s, that I can't even begin to watch them all. But here are links to just a few of my international favorites (read the comments, etc, on the YouTube pages for more details):

Denmark 1983     Israel 1985     Norway 1983     Greece 1977     Netherlands 1966     United Kingdom 1981    Belgium 1967     Finland 1966     Iceland 2000
Cyprus 1987 - the song is a dud, but those dancers are HOT
Sweden 1977 - An astoundingly lame Beatles tribute song. Check the comments section below for more on this one!

And you just can't go wrong with virtually all of the 1976 edition:
Austria     Finland     Switzerland      France     Israel
And the United Kingdom.
They swept the award in 1976 with one of the biggest hits in Eurovision history, earning an 80% vote. The song is "Save Your Kisses For Me" (mp3) by Brotherhood of Man. It is indeed insanely catchy, and the dancing has certainly won my vote! And these guys were in for the long-haul, not only scoring several chart topping hits, but staying together and performing to this day. You can even book them for your next event!

If you find any other favorites, post them in the comments. My eyes are not yet fully glossed over with Eurovision cheese.

Swedish Metal Aid (mp3)

Wouldn't you like to have long soft curly blond hair, scented with musk - dangling over firm shoulders - a loose silk shirt with the top open, revealing a hairy chest and a gold chain - singing your heart out to save people about to die of hunger in Ethiopia? If you could you would, and the Swedes did do it in '85. Joey Tempest (Wikipedia) from "Europe" wrote the song "Give a Helpin' Hand" (mp3) which sold 50.000 copies. See the 120 Swedish hard rockers here (Youtube) and dream about swimming in fluffy blond hair.

Solid Gold Dancers vs Hot Gossip

Those of us of a certain age (okay, in our 30s) remember spending our formative years fantasizing about what was lurking beneath the spandex of those incredibly sexy Solid Gold Dancers. As the most exciting part of Solid Gold, they commanded the airwaves with their weekly pop music countdown from 1979-1988 (though the dancing heyday ended in 1986, when most of the dancers quit the show).

But wait, you say you grew up across yon ocean in England-land? Well, then in that case you probably had the same exciting thoughts about Hot Gossip, the dance troupe that scandalized the average televison viewer and launched the career of Sarah Brightman.

Thanks to the seemingly omnipresent YouTube, you can now relive those Solid Gold and Hot Gossip moments, which have previously been locked tightly in the vaults of your memory.

The Frog

I revere Crazy Frog. I am not alone. To Live and Shave In LA's Tom Smith has decided his advent to culture will among other things simply mean that the Noise genre is finished: "Crazy Frog makes rickety teak wind chimes of the entire Whitehouse ouevre." Do not fear Avian Flu being swept westward across the Atlantic. There is something in Europe as we speak even more destructive to mankind that will move from Ringtones to turning Kelly Clarkson not to mention Wolf Eyes and company into the meaningless dust they are. And then, it will not stop there. See it, be it. Crazy Frog Video 1 (1.78MB mpeg) 2 (7.9MB mpeg) 3 (7.8MB mpeg) 4 (1018k mpeg). Here is an MP3 of some collaged bits including a news report overview on the Crazy One. Hail the Frog.

Eurovision and Philosophy (mp3, video)

The biggest news this weekend is of course the triumph of Finnish monster Lordi at the Eurovision song contest in Athens, Greece. As always, WFMU's Beware of the Blog was on the ball very early and predicted the outcome. Since Mr. Lordi expressed his love for Greek history and Greek food in this interview, it seems appropriate to remind everyone that Eurovision has brought more to the world than the tasteful costumes of Lordi and Dschingis Khan.

I will only highlight two of dozens of deeply philosophical songs from the rich and colorful Eurovision history. In 1979, Elpida from Greece entered the contest with a song about Socrates (MP3), finishing 8th. But the epitome of European high-brow songwriting, and the answer to all of Socrates' questions was 1975's winning entry from the Netherlands, Ding-A-Dong (MP3) by Teach-In. It isn't quite complete without the visuals, but you can see them perform it live on the legendary German TV show Disco in this clip on YouTube.

And if you haven't had enough yet, check out lots of great pictures from past Eurovision song contests here.

Cheesy Euro Disco To Spin Your Plates To (video)

Admittedly there's no topping Armi and Danny, and Enrique and Ana are a little too geared to the pre-pubescent market to be true disco. But Spain is in Europe, they do chant Disco! Disco! Disco! with impunity, and those spinning plates and the odd Chipmunk chorus are pretty damn cheesy, so it makes the cut: [download video, 4 megs, mpeg format] More Cheesy Euro-Disco links here. via earnest little cartoon guy

Cleaning Out My Inbox

It's been a long time. The old inbox is bursting at the seams.

Best homoerotic fight scene ever: [download video, 24 megs, mpeg format] via Fulminatia, RIP

A few people pointed out that the dancing fedora man in this Howlin Wolf video was Son House. Here's Son House playing, not dancing: [download video, 38 megs, mpeg format] via dailymotion

When it wasn't trying to overthrow Central American countries, The United Fruit Company (Chiquita Banana) was rewriting its jingles to combat world hunger, by urging people to eat more Chiquita Bananas! [download MP3] thanks, Stark Effect!

The artwork on this page is by Boris Artzybasheff, an incredible Russian illustrator whose work has just been collected posthumously into a new volume called As I See. via Irwin.

Anime-based annoyance that never ends (shockwave page), via Listener John in Oslo.

Being Helpful as an act of subversion. Thanks Kenzo!

20 Sounds That Must Die.

Various rapper-based chip products, via Listener Nell.

The complete Internal Revenue Code Podcast Project, via listener Tom. (Nobody tell Kenny G!)

How to turn your telephone into a transmitter.

Stanley Kubrick's pre-film work as a photographer.

Virtual Miss Germany, Ich Liebe Dich.

Early Wright Brothers photographs, via tollfreedom

This qualifies as cheesy euro-disco, I guess. It's got a mirrored ball, after all: Petey and Jaydee's Na Na Na: streaming video link, shades of the hamsterdance.

In case you missed it, we're up to 64 Stairways to Heaven, roughly twice as many as we started with. And don't miss the incredible backwards Stairway video, from Listener Neil's blog.

Cheesy Euro-Skydiving Video

Aficionados of the genre understand that when it comes to Cheesy Euro-Disco, it's all about location, location, location. And props. Props and location, in the opposite order. Dancing cossacks are also helpful, but not absolutely necessary. A succesful Cheesy Euro-Disco video needs to be set in outer space, a bucolic meadow, or involve power tools, football-helmet-sporting bikini babes. Or involve dancing cossacks.

This video [download it as a 9 meg wmv file or as a 22 meg mpg file here] may not fulfill the cossack policy, but it does include accordian-playing skydivers wearing Russian military uniforms. The skydivers include Alexander Beloglazoff, world-record holder for longest freefall involving an augmented seventh chord. The music is In-Grid's song Tu Es Foutu, as though you didn't already know that, you Cheesy Euro-Disco slut, you. via del.icio.us/tag/video

UPDATE: I uploaded a 22 meg mpg version of the video, then changed the original "avi" version to a wmv file, which is the actual format..

The "I'm Too Sexy" Fan Video Phenomenon

Sometime when I wasn't looking, the infectiously ridiculous song I'm Too Sexy assumed new power and meaning in the world.  Maybe not for you. Maybe not for anyone you know. But for Japanese people by the truckload. For Anime and gaming fans. For karaoke singers. For anyone with a new camcorder for Christmas and the simple, honest desire to be incredibly buff and sexy, all at the same time.

And the magic of sites like YouTube is in revealing such odd obsessions.

The other night, while scouring YouTube for anything resembling Cheesy Euro-Disco, I stumbled onto versions of the 1992 dance/pop hit, I'm Too Sexy, by the Brit-Pop trio Right Said Fred. (YouTube does have videos of Baccara's Yes Sir, I Can Boogie and Sorry I'm a Lady, but they're horribly disappointing.)

But Fan Videos of I'm Too Sexy -- that's another story, Search for I'm Too Sexy and up come dozens and dozens of homemade fan videos and karaoke sessions based on the song, from all over the world. Anime and Gaming freaks. Giggly teenagers. Your drunk Uncle.

Why a Beatles fan would take footage of The Fab Four and set it to the tune of Right Fucking Said Fred is beyond me, but, here it is: (download video, 15 meg Windows Media file). And here are I'm Too Sexy Fan Videos dedicated to the imaginary catwalk stylings of Japanese bands like Miyavi and Gackt and Dir En Grey (streaming videos from YouTube).

If you don't know the song I'm Too Sexy, here's a great mashup of it, combined with Kraftwerk's The Model, by Frenchbloke and Son (download MP3 Sexy Model).

The I'm Too Sexy fan video phenomenon first surfaced a few months ago when this video remix of the song made the rounds, as sung by My Little Pony (download video, 10 meg Windows Media file). Cute enough, I thought at the time - in fact, too cute. Little did I know that this was merely the tip of the iceberg. The song's been remixed by World of Warcraft fans (download video, 7meg Windows Media file), Final Fantasy gamers, Simpsons / Family Guy fans, combination Chipmunks/CSI obsessives, Mortal Kombat freaks,  Kids In The Hall DVD owners and one anime version after another after another....(all streaming videos from YouTube)

Boney M. (video, mp3, midi)

(UPDATE: Contains 1 MIDI, 1 MPEG video, 1 MP3 2 MP3s)

We all know that WFMU is poised to become the authoritative on-line resource for Cheesy Euro-Disco. However, for inexplicable reasons one of the most important and educational bands in this genre, Boney M., has not been featured on this blog yet. It is time for this to change.

It all started in 1975 when German producer Frank Farian scored a hit under the pseudonym Boney M. with "Baby Do You Wanna Bump?". He decided that he needed some good-looking dancers and singers to present to the public, and so the band Boney M. came into being, with official members Marcia Barrett, Liz Mitchell, Bobby Farrell, and Maizie Williams. Of those four, Bobby Farrell and Maizie Williams were only lip-syncing and dancing, all the male vocals were contributed by Farian himself. Later on Farian would perfect this technique by creating the lip-sync duo Milli Vanilli.

Sitting On A Bullet Thinking Of Power

Where have you gone, 1991?  Here's a short piece of video that triggered my - get this - nostalgia!  Well, as Caetano Veloso said in 1972, "that's what rock n'roll is all about", so let's rock.

Here we have the fabulously sleazy-chic Udo Kier as the desperately horny Hans in Gus Van Sant's "My Own Private Idaho".  Udo sprinkles a little Sprockets on Dean Stockwell's Ben in Blue Velvet, and voila - a bit of lampshade cabaret performance for the benefit of River Phoenix and Keanu Reeves that strangely prefigures The Electric 6's "Danger High Voltage" video, which is not very nostalgic at all.

Udo Kier sings about Berlin! New York! Moscow! Tokyo! (wmv download, 10 Megs)

Worst. Choreography. Ever. (video)

The first Cheesy Euro-Disco find of 2006 makes up in choreography for what it lacks musically. If you like dreadful choreography, that is. It's the video for Finnish duo Armi & Danny's I Wanna Love You Tender: [download video, 38 mb mpeg file]. Armi & Danny's choreographer for this peppy little number was none other than former Serbian president Slobodon Milosevic. After watching this, it's not hard to understand why he ditched the show business job for a career as a genocidal maniac.

Actually, it's hard to decide which is worse - the dancing, or the sweaters. But after such a long drought at Beware of the Blog's Cheesy Euro-Disco bureau, it's heartwarming that we even have such questions to ponder. via del.icio.us/tag/video. More Cheesy Euro-Disco links here.

They Called Her Mrs. Bowie

Don't worry, fabulous space-kittens, this isn't an R.I.P. post. Angie Bowie is alive and well, hanging out with pals like Xaviera Hollander and Mick Karn, and writing pocket books about bisexuality.

In fact, here's a cool interview with the lady with some great pictures. Better yet, you MUST see Angie in a leotard thong, with giant press-on nails and a *ahem* handsome escort in these incredible videos!

10, officer.

"We all love music, and we all love to watch hand skills. So watch Greg Irwin and his incredible finger dexterity as he bust out moves to the beat of De'vo's music."

(The other Devo.)