WFMU's Psychological Profile: The Dollar-Store Method

Having too much free time one evening, I fed some names and phrases thru WFMU's site search. It was revealing. If you have too much free time.

Backtrack: A few weeks ago (with the encouragement of too much cachaça) I proposed that WFMU's puppetmasters hire a qualified clinician to compile a psychological profile of station staff. Such a survey would provide valuable insight into the WFMU psyche -- and, perhaps more importantly, spark a Seven Second Delay episode in which Andy Breckman could further ridicule his colleagues (I suggested Andy fund the study). Besides chronicling our common delusions, such a profile would extend to our volunteers and listeners. The WFMU family -- strange DNA, yes?  We could data-mine the results to our advantage -- improve fundraising outreach, or fine-tune next year's T-shirt motif. The emerging character patterns might prove useful to the Department of Homeland Security. WFMU: Confronting paradigms of hegemonic conformity with a near hesychastic acuity.

Mix me another, Hank.

We estimated the study would cost around $25,000 -- a sum that might require actual labor on Andy's part to earn -- then the cachaça wore off, and we came to our senses and dropped the idea. By "we" I mean "they."

Perhaps the following site search results are the next best thing. Note the interesting juxtapositions and comparative values. While falling short of a psychological portrait, the results catalog some curious aspects of WFMU cultural priorities (air and web). Deceased French production music composer Roger Roger scored more hits than the Grateful Dead.  But Jandek swamped both. The results for "Gorky's" "Zygotic" "Mynci" prove that some WFMU staffers can't spell (Welsh). In a battle of Roberts, Wyatt got seven times as many hits as Johnson. Forgotten early 1900s baseball nutjob Rube Waddell notched double the total references to Babe Ruth. Besides their diamond exploits, both are namesakes for bands that only fetishistic WFMU types care about -- twice as much for the former apparently as for the latter. "Shatner" outscored "Nascimento" and "Phair."  Our isoquants have no predictive utility.

Herewith, the search results. Draw your own conclusions. If you have some free time. By "some" I mean "too much."

"the fall" = 649
   ("the fall schedule" = 5)
   ("in the fall" = 36)
"stevie moore" = 556
"beach boys" = 835
"pet sounds" = 285
"sun ra" = 598
"zappa" = 259
"sonic youth" = 372
"bollywood" = 185
"stereolab" = 354
"moog" = 245
"guided by voices" = 203
"Coltrane" = 295
"partch" = 136
"moondog" = 253
"grateful dead" = 113
"roger roger" = 118
"Raymond Scott" = 254
"Shatner" = 82
"Jandek" = 189
"byrds" = 285
"byrds" + "brainen" = 68
"nrbq" = 455
"nrbq" + "brainen" = 280
"ellington" = 274
"Hank Williams" = 275
"stravinsky" = 111
"led zeppelin" = 170
"electric light orchestra" = 116
"the move" = 317
"the move" - "terre" = 170
"U2" = 54
"Joanna Newsom" = 107
"beatles" = 1010
"Buddy Holly" = 123
"Joe Meek" = 78
"yo la tengo" = 367
"Robert Johnson" = 44
"Robert Wyatt" = 306
"laura veirs" = 119
"gorky's" = 159
"zygotic" = 163
"mynci" = 160
"peel sessions" = 175
"comelade" = 155
"brian eno" = 355
"go home" = 360
"go home productions" = 179
"joe walsh" = 18
"joe walsh" + "Mike Lupica" = 6
"swell maps" = 142
"nascimento" = 51
"phair" = 51
"rodd keith" = 49
"rube waddell" = 55
"Babe Ruth" = 27
"Yogi Berra" = 7
"Mickey Mantle" = 1
"Derek Jeter" = 0
"Bob Dylan" = 538
"Gershwin" = 64
"Cole Porter" = 50
"Andre Williams" = 134
"Louis Armstrong" = 203
"Streisand" = 24
"randy newman" = 84
"george bush" = 49
"Condoleezza" = 7
"Condoleeza" = 6
"bad acid" = 9
"megan" + "styx" = 2
"Francine Reed" = 0
"rod mckuen" = 122
"kenny g" + "sucks" = 8
"satan" = 384
"prince of darkness" = 14
"Zionist" = 5
"islamofascist" = 0
"god is dead" = 9
"kiss my ass" = 4

Comments

[Listener James from Westwood]

nomi = 71
klaus nomi = 63
klaus kinski = 14
kinski = 92
food for thought = 10
grounds for further research = 0

—Listener James from Westwood (2)

[Bas van Dam]

love = 8466

:)

[John L]

"Our isoquants have no predictive utility."

I can't find a definition to isoquant. And what is this sentence supposed to mean anyway?

Cheers,

Lipwak

[John L]

OK, Irwin told me what isoquant meant, at the remote today, and I have forgotten it by now but it appears to be a real word. I also forget what the sentance was supposed to mean but it was nice talking with Irwin anyway.

I wholeheartedly support the idea of creating a profile of the FMU listener and DJ. I've wondered about why I listen so much and wondered how the DJs deal with making it work. I look forward to contributing in any way I can.

Wouldn't that guy who was writing a book on FMU be a good resource? How is that going? And the film?

Cheers,

Lipwak

[Krys O.]

isoquants = bafflegab

http://www.investopedia.com/terms/i/isoquantcurve.asp

An isoquant is a collection of input combinations that yield the same output to a firm.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Isoquant

[Jeffersonic]

Elephant in the room=Beatles. Thanks for the Rube Waddell link. As a career nutjob it makes me feel a little less lonely....