Dusty Foggo and Nine Fingers Bassett

I didn't think they made names like this anymore.

Dusty and "Nine Fingers" were regulars at the CIA's "poker and hooker"  team-building sessions (at the Watergate Hotel, of course) that lurk behind Porter Goss's Friday night dismissal as CIA chief:

I'm being intentionally vague about what Dusty and Nine Fingers did, because their actions are unimportant. Dusty happens to be the number three man at the CIA, but to focus on such issues merely distracts from the core point.

Focus on the fact that their names are Dusty Foggo and "Nine Fingers" Bassett. Say the names slowly to yourself: Dusty Foggo. Nine Fingers Bassett.

No doubt, the liberal media will soon be punishing Dusty and Nine Fingers for exercising their God-given right to play poker and hire hookers. Bah. When names like Dusty Foggo and Nine Fingers Bassett emerge from the morass, attention must be paid, and it must be paid, irregardless of party affiliation or specific poker and hooker strategy.

Dusty Foggo and "Nine Fingers" Bassett are great Americans who receive expedited admission into the pantheon of funny Republican names, already populated by such greats as Spiro Agnew, Bebe Robozo, Newt Gingrich, Scooter Libby, Admiral Poindexter, or the reigning champion, Curveball. But Curveball's reign now ends. There's a new kid in town. Two of 'em, in fact.

All Hail Dusty and Nine Fingers. Your names are a gift to all of humanity.

Comments

[Mark]

I knew Dusty Foggo way back in the old high school days. He was a loser even then! I am astonished to find out that he was actually a CIA agent, let alone a high ranking official there in his adult life. Boy they sure have low standards!

[Bill W]

I wonder if Dusty Foggo ever lived in Foggy Bottom?

[jpeatt]

you all know "Spirow Agnew" is an anagram of "grow a penis", right???