You Bet Your Binky Dept.

It's like a Match Game question: "Jay Black is so broke (how broke is he?) he had to give up his BLANK!" No, not his bippy. After years of infamous notoriety, years of non-sobriety, years of wearing the mantle and stoking the flames of the Legend of Jay and the Americans, Jay Black may very well, before he knows it, be forced to trod the worn boulevards as lowly David Blatt- the defrocked Jay Black.

Originally coined "Binky Jones and the Americans," by writers and producers Leiber and Stoller, a gaggle of NYU wannabe's adopted the Jay and the Americans label with John (J.T.) Traynor as the fateful First Jay. After the weepy 1962 #5 smasheroo "She Cried," Jay Number One quit/was fired/I wasn't there and nether were you so who the hell knows? and a replacement was needed pronto. Enter high school gambling addict with the lungs of steel David "Jay Black" Blatt to belt out hit after hit after hit and then go back and belt out a few more. Lotsa hits that guy had. And a gambling addict to boot! Who knew?

Anyway, forty-so years later Jay gets himself into one heckuva gambling mess and now he has to claim bankruptcy and forfeit his signature moniker. Why? Because forty-so years after the fact, Jay Number One wants to rejoin the group! What the heck is going on here? What kind of world do we live in? How can this happen here?

OK, I'm upset and hopefully you are too.

So I caught Jay Black's act about ten years ago and I now file this report with WFMU's Beware of the Blog. [warning - highly offensive diatribe follows]

January, 1996

Jay Black smashed his ribs and punctured his famous lungs in a Cleveland, Ohio highway holiday smashup in November, 1995. Two months later I witnessed a spectacular comeback performance at the Club Bene, Black's unofficial home base in Sayerville, New Jersey. The intimacy in the room sizzled like an illicit poker game in the back of a union hall. Black's typical in-your-face, X-rated Bar Mitzvah act was tinged with a sense of mortality and defiance as he worked the club. He didn’t do much singing that night. But when he did, his one half of a working lung brought the house down. When he chose to speak, he spoke.

[Announcer: ...please welcome Jay Black!] Thank you. Thank you very much. You know, it really wasn’t an accident. I just needed the publicity. So I just went into the hospital to have my dick made larger. You could not imagine. This is the first thing that I could do since that happened to me and Tom Bene [club owner] walks back and says, “Can you sing?” I swear to God, I swear on everything I have that I did not hit one note since the night in Cleveland before the accident, right? I went “Aaaaah!” and then I left and twelve hours later I was in fucking critical condition. I have not done anything to sing. I went to the doctor last week to see if my lung sealed up because my ribs went through my lungs which is really a shitty thing to happen to any singer, I mean its a shame for it to happen to anybody, but you know, I never thought of myself as a singer until after I started reading about it and hearing and you know the way they were treating it and I said, “Holy shit, I need my lungs!” If you’re really concerned with living, you know, this doctor is saying “Well, we have to stick this pipe through your lung,” you know, and its kind of frightening. And you beep for the nurse and say “I didn’t know I was in critical condition,” and they say, “Well, you’re in critical condition cause if your lungs collapse anymore, we have two minutes to save your life.” And then you say to them “Then why the fuck did it take you five minutes to get in here?” Anyway... I was really touched by the mail, and the messages on my service were so touching, and it then that I realized how much I meant to so many people. I always knew how much you all meant to me because this is my life, what I do here, and it’s so great to be back. If in the middle of the show I heave up blood, understand that it’s not part of my act. But, it’s so great. And to see the Bene full, I mean, this is my payback to the way the hospital treated me so well. I knew that if I filled up the Bene there’ll be at least five or six hundred people going to the hospital tonight with food posioning. Fuck you, Tom! I got here just about twenty minutes ago. I wanna make sure he doesn’t feed me! Yeah, I got a punctured lung, broken ribs, a neck that will never heal and I’m shitting my fucking brains out from his new menu that he was bragging to me! Did you know Tom has a new menu? I’ve been coming here fifteen fucking years he changed the menu! Shrimp Scampi! Shit! What a bulletin! I heard it on CBS! “Bene has Shrimp Scampi!” Like the world gives a fuck! All right, I’m back in form again! I’d like to do “This Magic Moment.” Not because it was a hit record. I don’t know many other songs! I got either my fucking songs or... I don’t listen, do you listen to the radio a lot? I don’t know anything. We’ll just do hits off old albums... I’ve been interviewed by people all through the years and twelve years ago some guy says, “You know, Bruce Springsteen said that I was an influence on him” and all I can say is “Who the fuck is Bruce Springsteen?” I was so embarrassed, I didn’t know who anybody is! But, are you ready? This is better than telling you that you’re gonna fuckin’ die and give you an enema. (sings “This Magic Moment”) It’s good to see all the guys. I haven’t seen all these guys since the accident. (to the band) You almost lost me. You guys are lucky to have me back. Thirty years ago I would’ve walked outta the fucking car and flew home. I’m still not allowed to fly because of my lung. Just let me fucking hit these notes because I’m not allowed to fly. They’re worried about fucking cabin pressure, this is worse. I’m having trouble breathing here. You know, one of the messages I got was from Senator Leahey from New England. We did an Italian-American charity. I told this story the last time I was here. I never understood that when I got the call for the Italian-American charity. I said I’ve known Italians all my life and Italians mean something...they don’t take charity- they know how to fucking steal it! Well, anyway, it was a legitimate charity and they called me and said, “Jay, every year we select one of the great Italian singers.” I didn’t wanna tell him that I wasn’t Italian because I didn’t wanna break their hearts and besides I thought I was entitled to do the show because I do have Pavoratti’s body now. So we went and we did this thing and the President of the United States was there and it pissed me off. Turns out he was a fan of mine when he was in school, do you believe that? You get to meet the President of the United States- not many, probably nobody in this audience ever met a president... and you find out that you’re fucking ten years older than him? I was saying, “Why can’t I meet Reagan? At least the fuck would forget!” I’m not making fun of Alzheimer’s- it’s a serious thing and uh, what was I saying? But we had to put together a lotta songs for that show to try to make the theme of Italian-American, so the late Dean Martin recorded the song in the fifties, and then Bobby Rydell revived it in the sixties, so we wrote our own arrangement and it’s become one of my favorites, I love it. A lotta high notes, folks, so get that machine ready for my lungs. (sings “Sway”) One of my favorite parts of the show is when Bob Tendasco comes out and does a song. And Bobby never ceases to amaze me because he comes up every week and writes another song. And I love every song he writes. (to Bobby) Whattaya gonna do tonight? Look at him. Does that mean you’re thinking or you’re just tryin’ to pick your nose and you realized people are watching you? What would I like you to do? Let’s ask the audience- do you have any favorites that Bobby does? What about “The Little Girl?” ...Another pervert over there. No, this song wasn’t- did any of you see that movie “The Professional?” With that little girl and the hit man? She was twelve years old. Tell me the truth. If you were the hit man would you...? Everyone gets quiet when you talk about child shit. You know, they don’t like that stuff. They shouldn’t make those kind of movies where they make you wanna fuck a little girl like that. I say they shouldn’t make ‘em. It’s terrible. It’s very suggestive. All right. I’m a grandfather. I don’t give a fuck what I say. “Hey, he’s old and senile...besides he had a bad accident!” You’re gonna sing the song about the little girl? He wrote this about his girlfriend’s daughter and immediately people started sending out faxes and sending letters and calling, leaving messages requesting words to this song. Not because they just wanted to hear it again, but because they had a daughter that was getting married and people wanted to do this song at their daughter’s wedding as opposed to uh, what? “Daddy’s Little Girl?” Is that the traditional thing? I’m trying to think, cause I have three sons and one daughter and my daughter never had a wedding. She just came to me with the baby and she said, “This is the kid and this is the fucking asshole!” That’s a true story. So I became a grandfather. We can’t find the guy or his body, but he’ll be found. Who stole my fuckin’ orange juice? That’s it for the rest of the show? All right. Thank you very much for being here tonight. Here’s Bobby Tendasco. (to Bobby) You drove home from Cleveland, right? (to audience) Who’s gotta go? Where’s he gotta go? He’s gotta take a leak? (to Bobby) You got no luck. You wanna wait til he comes back? Get a light on the guy that has to take a piss. we might as well humiliate him! No, get a light on him when he comes back! When he comes back and he has those little... stains on his pants! After having a few drinks, he didn’t know how to shake it! (band plays “Happy Trails”) They’re playing “Happy Trails” to you! (to Bobby) Why can’t you do it? I didn’t set the mood right. How was I to know some guy was gonna stand up with his dick in his hand? I’ll set the mood, all right. If you have a daughter- (to man in audience) you have three daughters? How old are they? Twenty-three, nineteen and eighteen? I’d like to come to dinner! You would get very emotional if you have a daughter. I never get emotional. My daughter is a fucking asshole. She is! She’s a pain in the ass. And she moved- my kids. I keep moving and they keep coming to me! I keep hiding and they just keep coming. They find me! They love their daddy. (to Bobby) Why don’t you write a song about my kids? My oldest son, Fredo. He was in Vegas learning the casino business. From Moe Green. What’s that? Your daughter’s getting married? Wait, wait, wait wait you never heard this? This is better than “Daddy’s Little Girl.” I guarantee it. Okay? And I tell you what. You see Bobby- when is she getting married? Hey, if you wanna give me fifty grand, I could be there! Congratulations. And- what’s that, sir? Oh you mean forty-nine for you? Huh? Well, just mention Shrimp Scampi! I’ll know that I saw you at the Bene. Tom, great idea! Shrimp Scampi! Your business is booming! Especially next week- who do you have? I saw that great marquee outside- “ZOOKIE ZOOK.” It’s such an honor to be on the marquee with all these big names. Jay Black. Zimmy Zit. Leroy Penis. I love the ride here. This fucking town died in the sixties! “GO-GO GIRLS!” What the fuck is a Go-Go Girl? When I was on Hullabaloo thirty years ago... fucking Sayerville still has Go-Go Girls! I picture some eighty year old woman in a cage going “My tapeworm!” You’re getting to think that I’m a fucking opening act! Oh, man. Isn’t it amazing that I’m doing all this? And my head wasn’t even injured in the accident! Okay, now listen. What’s your name, sir? Sal? You listen- you know Danny Aiello-one of my- I love him, And you know, he wrote a letter that I was one of his favorites, and you know that he has a lot of favorite singers. He came to my show at Westbury. He’s was crying when Bobby did this song. He actually sang this to his daugher... October, not this past October, October of last year at her wedding, so now this is how the song will impress you. Tom? Could you get the lights down? Good. Now, could we get a little fan going to get the smell of that Scampi out of the air? (Tendasco sings his song. Someone hands him flowers after he finishes.) Yeah! Even a man can get flowers. You got’em and you didn’t even get fucked up in the accident! What’s that? Oh, is this the guy that took a leak? Did he wash? Okay, ladies and gentlemen... November second I was fifty-seven years old and a week later I was in the hospital and that was pretty depressing cause I wanted to live til at least fifty-eight. And when they were taking me in the ambulance, they called in and they said that it was a fifty-seven year old. You never realize your age until people talk about you. They have to give your age to the people in the hospital waiting for you in the emergency room and all that shit. I said, “Wow, I’m a fucking old man!” And then when I started thinking about losing my voice completely, I really started getting scared. Cause the only thing that makes me feel young is when I can get out here and hit the same notes I hit thirty-five years ago. And I’m gonna try and do that for you right now with this next one. This’ll collapse my lungs! (sings “Cara Mia”) Thank you. You don’t have to stand, it’s all right. Thank you very much. Despite that Hall of Fame thing, honestly speaking- and I’m gonna be very honest with you about this... I shoulda been inducted four or five years ago! No, no, no, I’m going by the criteria! Not by ego, cause I don’t give a fuck. I’m gonna tell ya honestly if I never make it...I really don’t care. I tell you the truth, this year there was a group that was in there that I never even heard of! But the criteria of the whole thing is: how many hits you had, how long you lasted. I’m doing this thirty-four years and groups that were inducted, I don’t even let open for me! And they make a quarter of the money I make per performance and they haven’t had as many hit records as I’ve had and the time I had the hit records was during the British Invasion when Frankie Valli, myself and the Beach Boys were the only Americans on the charts. There’s something very political involved in this and there’s a few guys on the committee that do not like me for some reason. Whether I screwed their wives’ many years ago, I don’t know what it was, maybe I gave one of them a beating, but I don’t care. I appreciate the gesture. This is my Hall of Fame right here when everybody shows up to see me and that’s it. I love you all and I don’t give a fuck if they ever- you know what? It’s like these people that wanna be remembered after they die. Truthfully, after I die, I don’t care, I’m not gonna know. It’s like they say “Oh they’re gonna make a stamp outta me.” Fuck it! Let the women lick me now! I just hope that I’m wrong. I hope that you do know what’s going on and you can realize how much people love you. I was fortunate enough to be alive after that accident and feel the love coming. But you take a guy like this next singer that I’m gonna do a song of his. One of my close friends in the business. One of the greatest singers that ever lived: Roy Orbison. I only wish that Roy could see how much people appreciated and loved him. What? You really believe that? You believe there’s something afterwards? I don’t wanna get into religion. I never in my whole career, I never got into politics or religion. But it’s like people said to me. I said, “My car almost went over a cliff.” And they said “Thank God!” And I said “Wait a minute. You’re blaming the driver for the fucking accident and God gets the credit that I didn’t go over the cliff!” Now if God was a heavyweight he woulda stopped the accident. I don’t under- I hope you’re right. I’d really hate to think you just close your eyes and that’s it. And then maggots crawl up your ass. I mean if I want that, I could just stay at the Bene! I love you, Tom! They think I come here cause I love you. I come here cause I owe this fuck so much money! Let’s salute Orbison right. Get the lights down, Tommy. (sings “Running Scared”) Elvis Presley was Roy Orbison’s favorite singer. Roy Orbison was Elvis Presley’s favorite singer. And I have an Elvis song to do. I usually read the words because I don’t fucking know it, but I left my glasses in New York. So I’m gonna huhmuhnuhmuhmuh sound like Elvis. (sings “It’s Now or Never”) Thank you. I’d like ta do two Jay and the Americans songs for you. We recorded- the first one I’m gonna do we did in 1963 and that seems like ages ago, and the other one, believe it or not, was 1970 which even that-Go ahead Sal, you deserve it. Would I wait? Would you wait? That’s the secret. Go ahead, go, Sal, don’t be embarrassed. Whattaya gotta make? One or two? Go. Go ahead, go. Tommy, can he pee under the table? Sal is a good guy. All right, don’t miss a shit. You’re getting too old to miss one. We’re gonna do “Only in America” and “Walking In The Rain.” (sings “Only In America” and ”Walking In The Rain”) Okay. You wanna say “Happy Birthday” to your Aunt Dee? Who’s Dee? Today’s your birthday? Tomorrow? You’re gonna be forty-two, is that what it says? You look like a little girl. Happy Birthday, sweetheart. You look so great for your age. Maybe cause I date fifteen year olds. You look great. Your brother loves you? No one admits they love you. If someone asks you for an autograph they say “My mother loves you,” or “My brother loves you.” No one ever says “I love you.” I was fucking married and she never told me that. You love me? Thank you. I love you, too. Sal? Sal, you must love me, cause when you come outta there, your bladder’s gonna be gone! Okay, Dee. Happy Birthday. I’m glad we got to this. What else we got here? The mai tre d’ of the Club Bene, Bill. Today’s his thirty-fifth anniversary. Is that his wedding anniversary? Or is that his anniversary of working at the Bene? Bill, is that your wedding anniversary? Okay, good. Congratulations. Thirty-five years! My god! You coulda killed ten people and been out! Thirty-five years married to the same person. Jesus Christ! I thought it was thirty-five years at the Bene and you were celebrating because they changed the fucking menu! Sal! Go already, willya! You’re making me nervous! It’s the thing under the zipper, Sal! I tend to forget myself. Don’t get too close to the urinal there, Sal. I have to get close. I yeah, I got a nice letter- I can’t read this. It’s from the Cascades. Is this the Cascades that made “Rhythm of the Rain?” Where are ya, pal? I read your letter back in the dressing room. Are you here? He’s in Staten Island now? Is he here in the audience? Oh, he sent you? Great! Tell ’em I comin’ to see him next week! Well, that was nice. It was a nice letter. Thank you anyways... No one wants ta see me. They send people. Who’s there? The fuckin’ sherrif’s office or something? Yeah, what was it about? Some loan that I didn’t pay? Go fuck ‘em! I gotta go home and hear the scores! The lady in the front was right. Even the law knows you’re fucked. What’s this? Somebody gave me their check. They want me ta pay the check! Where’s my glasses? I’d love ta see this thing! A hundred and forty-nine dollars? Tom! For two cokes? And a shrimp- what does this say? Can you read what it says? Fuckin’ waitresses are like writing prescriptions. What’s it say there? It says “Two Quaaludes.” Who’s check is it? Do what everyone else does: Run out! Sal’s smart! He’s ain’t pissing! He’s in his car! Sal conned everybody! “You know, I gotta piss!” And he’s goin’ like this: “Fuck that fat guy singing, AND Club Bene AND THE SHRIMP SCAMPI!” [Sal: (from the audience) Hey, Jay! I’m back!] Sal, you didn’t piss on some person standing near you? What happened? There was a line? What else we got? [Tommy Tendasco: (reading a note from audience) Its a note from Beth. Whenever she sees Frankie Valli, whenever he hits the high notes, he always holds the microphones towards the audience. She says something like “you guys do this better.”] Well, that’s because he’s Frankie Valli. He lost his voice when he was twenty-three. Beth? Where are ya, Beth? I’m forwarding this letter to Frankie Valli. But you could probably kick the shit outta him anyway, so don’t worry about it. That’s it? It’s his birthday today? Yesterday was his birthday? Ladies and gentlemen, my drummer, Tommy’s brother, Johnny Tendasco. Happy birthday, John! Jack Benny! Thirty-nine! These fucking jeans I’m wearin’ are thirty-nine! I don’t mean the size, I mean the age. Ladies and gentlemen, I want you to sing with me this time. This is one of the big hits we had in 1964. We’re gonna take you out west. West of Sayerville, where they have nicer Go-go dancers. A little cafe...When we come to the “A little bit closer” part, I’m not even gonna attempt ta sing it. I wanna hear this full house here tonight sing it. (Jay and the audience sing “Come A Little Bit Closer”) You’re wonderful. Thank you for spending this night with me on my comeback trail. I’m gonna have to take another month off, but this was worth it. I’m gonna do “Some Enchanted Evening.” You like “Sunday and Me,” hah? Most of the people don’t know what it is anyway. no, I don’t like it without the violins. You play violin? What a crude degenerate there. We’re gonna do “Some Enchanted Evening.” “Once you have found her, never let her go.” They wrote the song in the early fifties- Rogers and Hammerstein. It was in a musical called South Pacific. We had the biggest hit with it. Just for that, we should be in the Hall of Fame. We started the comeback of classic songs with this hit. And nobody- “Once you have found her, never let her go.” Just think of the lyrics they wrote then. “You may see a stranger across a crowded room.” Look how romantic. Have any of you ever seen a stranger? Across a crowded room? Did any of you meet that way? I saw a stranger across a crowded room- I realized I owed her money, I ran like a fuckin’ maniac. But that’s not what they meant. “Once you have found her, never let her go.” (Band starts singing “Once you have found her, never let her go.”) Don’t let her go. Or you’ll pay out of your ass all your life. (Sings “Some Enchanted Evening”) All right. You’re all gonna sing with me now and then we’re all gonna go bye-bye! (Sings reprise of “This Magic Moment”) I love you all! Thank you!

Comments

[dave]

general comment....I love the content on the site, truly exceptional. Please consider going to black text on white. I know it sucks design-wise, but when reading lots of small copy it really is easier on the eyes!
you guys rock

[Carrie P.]

Incredible. Very funny article. Is this an actual transcription?

Carrie

[Dave the Spazz]

Yup. I recorded the show and transcribed it about 10 years ago. Been sitting on it ever since wondering what the hell to do with it. Luckily Jay made himself somewhat newsworthy again. According to Wikipedia, Black got a warning from Gov. Pataki to keep his act clean when he performs in NY state!

He really did sing well that night, I gotta say.

[l]

I had no idea, Jay's voice is amazing on records, now I have to check him out. He's always doing gigs, is it anger or drinking?, cuz I have a buddy who is one angry cat, he gets mistaken for being drunk, he's just ornery

[binkyfreak]

This was hilarious. I had never heard of him, but will definitely check him out now. Thanks. binky

[kevin]

yes jay has a great voice and there is only one jay he ddid lose the rights to jay& the americans but he is still working and has a new website jayblackthevoice.com and has a show in april 2007 in westbury long island

thank's

[J.R. SUAREZ]

JAY BLACK, NO ONE CAN IMPERSONATE HIM OR BEGIN TO FILL HIS SINGING SHOES. HE WITHOUT A DOUBT IS THE MOST TALENTED LEAD SINGER TO COME OUT IN THE 1960'S. HE CAN SING ANYTHING WITH HIS BEAUTIFUL STRONG OPERATIC VOICE. IF EVERYONE COULD HEAR THIS MAN PERFORM, AT HIS AGE OF 68, THEY WOULD SAY HE IS A VOCAL TREASURE AND SHOULD BE TREATED LIKE ONE. HE SHOULD BE ON THE TODAY SHOW! JAY DOES NIEL DIAMOND SONGS LIKE NIEL SHOULD DO BUT DOESN'T HAVE THE RANGE.

[d]

Any chance of posting this as an mp3? I'm really intrigued by this "the little girl" song sung by Tendasco, but I can't find any other reference to it online.

[SUE ELLEN SUAREZ]

JAY, A NOTE TO SAY "THANKS" FOR EVERYTHING! FOR SHARING YOUR BEAUTIFUL VOICE WITH EVERYONE FOR SO MANY YEARS UNSELFISHLY. FOR LETTING ALL OF YOUR FANS TAKE PART IN YOUR LIFE AND ENJOY THE ENTERTAINMENT YOU PROVIDED NO MATTER HOW YOU FELT. DON'T LET ANY OF THE NEGATIVE COMMENTS GET YOU DOWN. THESE NEGATIVE PEOPLE ARE OBVIOUSLY NOT FANS AND NEED SOMEONE TO LET THEIR FUSTRATIONS OUT ON. YOU ARE THE BEST LEAD SINGER TO COME OUT IN THE 60'S AND ARE STILL THE BEST SINGER SINGING TODAY. "A VOCAL TREASURE"! JAY BLACK(DAVID BLATT) GIVES MORE THAN A FINE SINGING PERFORMANCE. HE GIVES FROM HIS HEART, EVERY NOTE THAT LIGHTENS OUR HEARTS. GOD BLESS HIM!! I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE HIM IN WESTBURY AT THE NORTH FORK THEATRE 4-14-07 HIS 45TH ANNIVERSARY CONCERT!!

[J.R. SUAREZ]

April 26, 2008, North Fork Theater at Westbury, NY. What a Show! Jay Black brought the house down and sang Cara Mia twice! This man continues to amaze me! What GOD given talent he has! What an entertainer of adult comedy! This man gives new meaning to Neil Diamond songs. How can anyone do songs better than the original artist. Jay is "THE VOICE" and the best singer performing today!This man and his music is news. Where he has been, who he has entertained. I can't say enough about the talent that this man "JAY BLACK" still has. Jay Black continues to tour and play to sold-out audiences. Jay Black has earned the nickname "THE KING OF WESTBURY" for his sold out performances for 45 years at New York's Westbury Music Fair, which is the number one venue of its size. Jay Black is a vocal treasure and should be treated like one!