Are you aware of the strange things that Don does to his fans to Make Them Scream For More? Have you ever wondered why Mark has this powerful need to Do His Thing? And what about Mel and his Burning Desire To Satisfy? Well, wonder no more, because Ernie Tucker has all the answers on this 1972 LP, Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Grand Funk Railroad: Side One (25 meg MP3) | Side Two (29 meg MP3).
This was the hotly anticipated followup to Mr. Tucker's Everything You Always Wanted To Know About David Cassidy and the critically acclaimed but commercially disappointing, Everything You Always Wanted To Know About The Osmonds.
I tried playing this on the air yesterday, but it turned my stomach after several minutes and I had to bail out. Once the screaming teenage girls fade out, one is left with way too much information about Flint, Michigan's Thrilling Threesome With The Hot 'N' Heavy Sound, and how they Get Their Kicks just by doing What Comes Naturally, Babeee!
Thanks Brian and Megan.
I was kind of hoping the tracks would be blank - because that is exactly how much I want to know about Grand Funk Railroad. But no, there is stuff there, and now I have to listen to it, because I am obsessive that way. Thanks, Ken. Thanks a lot.
Posted by: ResidentClinton | October 26, 2006 at 02:57 PM
I have the Osmonds version, but it always gives me terrible anxiety, because the super fast-talking woman who does it is edited so that she never takes a breath, and she talks in super-long run on sentences anyway, and just when you think she should be gasping, she reels off another string off facts and quasi-anecdotes with the kind of lurching, dememnted, bubbly enthusiasm one could only get from repeated shots to the chest of adrenaline...it's kind of like when Centipede is getting faster and faster and you begin to feel delirious...
Posted by: andy | October 26, 2006 at 03:58 PM
Wow.
Wow.
"smoke steamin' body funk from the midwest, Grand Funk, a bruising, blasting electric vibration ia a railroad for its generation, and running like a clockwork orange, right on its time"
Get that guy a paragraph break! I can hear the spittle attempting to exit his throat.
Posted by: the man in lumberjack vee | October 27, 2006 at 07:07 PM
This is awesome. It's somewhere between Spinal Tap and Some King of Monster. I hope the people the make Metalocalypse parody it.
Posted by: Dan | October 28, 2006 at 01:39 PM
Lemme just say this for the record: GFR sucked from go. I know, I was there. I'm sorry, but they will continue to suck until the end of time. The most daunting thing [apart from the fact that some WFMU DJs insist on playing GFR's "I'm Your Captain", the suckiest & longest of all GFR's "music"] is that Grand Funk Railroad is really and truly an American Band.
Posted by: Shtebe N | December 19, 2012 at 09:42 PM
Grand Funk was great. I was there, too, and as a kid from the midwest, their early, raw, garagey, political, power-trio rock was a revelation. Inside Lookin' Out, Mean Mistreator, T.N.U.C., Got This Thing On The Move - Raw Beauty. They did go downhill over time, but, besides Dylan, who doesn't? Saw them reunited in '97 and it was fantastic. GFR deserves to be in the Hall of Fame. Chicago, too. Just my opinion. Watch this and you'll see why they were great. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fyF5J7au1jE
Posted by: Clay Pigeon | February 18, 2013 at 02:30 PM