In Space, No One Can Hear You Type

Ihaven'twrittenapostinawhile.Oops,Iforgottoputspacesbetweenthewords. There that's better.
Hey,IwonderwhatwouldhappenifIdidn'tputANYspacesbetweenthewordsasItyped? Atall? And...WhatIfIPutACapitalLetterAtTheBeginningOfEachWordLikeThisToMakeItEasier
ToRead? Hey, I wonder if...

Hey, look...

WhenIDoThatItMakesTheTextOneBigLineThatWon'tBreak.AndItJustKeepsGoingUnderTheGraphicsOnTheRightOfTheWebsiteAndBeyond.YouCanUseTheScrollBarAtTheBottomOfTheBrowserPageOrMaybeStretchThePageToReadIt.WhatDoYouKnow.LookHowFarItGoesOut.Wow.LookAtAllTheSpaceOutHere!ICanSeeAReally,ReallyLongWay.IWonderIfThereIsAnEdge.IFeelsGoodToStretch.IWonderWhatElseIsOutHere.Hello!Hello!Hellllooooooo!!!CanAnybodyHearMe!No.Wow.TalkAboutPrivacy.Hmmm,IDon'tThinkICanTypeAnyQuestionMarksEitherOrItBreaksTheLine.I'llBetTheHitCountOutHereIsWayBelowZero.IWonderWhereTheSeriesOfTubesIs.HaHa!WowEverything'sSoBlack.ButICanSeeThere'sNoLitter,NoNothing.NotASmudge.TheAirFeelsPristine!Ahhhhhhhh.ThisIsGreat!IFeelSoFree!ILoveBeingOutHereAllAlone.NoManIsAnIsland,AllThatCrap,HehHeh.SpeakingOf,Wait,Ohhh,WaitLetMeStopAndTurnAroud.Wow.LookAtTheInternetBehindMe!I'veGoneFartherThanI'dThought,ItLooksSoPrettyFarAway,It'sSoColorful.Hmm,IWonderIfAnythingIsInTheOtherDirection.WhoCares!Haha!I'mJustGonnaKeepGoingAndGoing!Wow,ICanThinkSoMuchClearerOutHere.I'llJustWalkAndSeeWhereItTakesMe.IHopeIDon'tGetLost!Actually,IDon'tCareIfIDo.MaybeI'dBetterShutUp,BecauseTheMoreIType,TheMoreIDriftOutToSea.TheTypingIsLikeATideCarryingMeOutHelplesslyToSea.Help!ICan'tSwimAgainstTheCurrentOfMyOwnWillToBlatherOnWithSelfImportance!PayAttentionToMe!Haha!WillThisOneLastStabAtRelevancyBeMyDownfallIWonder.OopsI'dBetterSpellCheckThis.Wait,ICan't,It'sAllOneWord.HaHa!Wait,HowFarOutAmINow.Oh,IDon'tCare!HmmWaitMaybeIShouldCare,LetMeTurnAroundAndLookAgain.Ohh,Wow,TheInternetIsEvenFartherAwayNow.ThatDidn'tTakeLong.WowItLooksLikeAGiantCircusTentCityWayOnTheHorizon.Hmm,IGuessThat'sKindOfWhatIThoughtItWouldLookLikeInThisKindOfSituation.OhWellSoMuchForCliches.ButLookingAheadOfMe,IReallyStillDon'tSeeAnythingAtAll.BlackBlackBlack.WhoDesignsOnTheWebWithBlackBackgroundAnymore.Blech!OhWell,It'sReeeealQuietOutHere.MaybeThereReallyIsNothingOutThereAheadOfMe,Literally.ShouldITurnAroundAndGoBackIWonder.No,TheHellWithIt.I'llBeFine.I'llJustKeepGoing.WhatIfItIsEndlessThough.Hmmm.Weird.ItLooksLikeI'mInTheClosingCreditsOfAMovieOutHereOutHere.IfItWereWhiteItWouldLookLikeACarCommercial.Haha!OkayNotAGreatJoke,ButWhoCares,NoOne'sGoingToReadItOutHere!OutsideTheInternet,NoOneCanHearYouScream.No,YourJokes.Wait,No:InBlankSpace,NoOneCanHearYouScream.AnotherBadOne.ButWho'sGonnaReadIt.JustMe!DoIEvenExistOutHereIWonder.No,OhWait,I'veGotAGoodOneNow:NoMatterHowLoudlyYouType,OutsideTheInternetNoOneCanHearYou,Uh,Type.NoThat'sStupid.OhWaitNo,I'veGotIt.ItShouldJustBeThis:InOuterSpaceNoOneCanHearYouType.Hey,ThatShouldBeTheTitleOfThisPost!I'llTypeThatUpAtTheTopOfTheTitleBarWhenIGetBack.Let'sSeeIfThat'sTrue.HowLoudICanType.Click!Click!!Click!!!Click!!!!Click!!!!!Click!!!!!!LetMeLookBack,Nope,NoReactionFromTheMainland.Wow,ItLooksReallyFarAwayNow.MaybeIShouldn'tGoTooFar,IDon'tWantToGetLost.MaybeIShouldHaveBroughtACompass,No,Wait.WouldThatWorkOutHereIWonder.MaybeOneOfThoseOnesFromMapquestOrGoogleEarthWould.WhoKnows.Hey,IsThisLike"Tron"Haha!Hey,WithNoOneWatchingIShouldGetNude.Haha.ShouldITakeOffAllMyClothesIWonder.Who'sGoingToMind.HehHeh.OkHereGoes.Ziiiiip,FlailFlail.HaHa!I'mWalkingNaked!I'mNudeOnTheInternet!Wait,No,I'mNudeOutsideTheInternet.OutsideTheInternet,NoOneCanSeeYouNude.HaHa!AnotherBomb.IFeelSoFree.Wheeeeee.Wheeee.Oh,Wow,SpinningAroundLikeThatMakesYouFeelReally,ReallyDizzyWhenThere'sNothingButBlackSpaceInFrontOfYourEyes.BetterKeepMoving.Ahhhh,AllThisNothingFeelsGoodWaftingThroughMyNetherRegions.ILoveBeingOutHere.WhatAVacation.IWonderIfI'mTheOnlyPersonWho'sEverComeOutHereThisFar.Hey,MaybeIShouldLeaveATrailOfSomethingSoICanFindMyWayBackHome.HeyIKnowI'llLeaveATrailOfMyClothesThatITookOff!LetMeGetThem,They'reRightBackHere.OhWait,WhereDidTheyGo.TheyWereRightBackHere.NowIDon'tSeeThem.AndWait,Where'sTheInternetFromHere.IDon'tSeeItOnTheHorizonAnymore.IWonderIfI'mIStillGoingTheSameDirectionThatIWas.UhOh,MaybeIShouldn'tHaveSpunAroundLikeThatBefore.IWonderIfI'mStillGoingInAStraightLineStill.Wait,Don'tPanic.Stop,LookAround,TheInternetCan'tHaveGottenFar.I'mSureIfIStareCloselyEnoughAroundTheHorizonI'llSeeIt.ButInWhichDirection.Brrr,It'sGettingChilly.WhereTheHellIsIt.Wait,It'sBehindMeMaybe.No.WhyDidIGetRidOfMyClothes,ThatWasStupid.Ok,Don'tPanic,Don'tPanic.I'mNotLost,IJustCan'tSeeAnything.Think.Hellooooo!Helloooooo!WhatAmIDoing.ThereAin'tNoOneOutHere.WhatShouldIDo.OhGodIThinkIShouldJustKeepMoving.WhichWayIWonder.Ok,ThisWay.No.Wait,YeaThatWay.GoodGod,Where.Wait,Where,IShouldFindMyClothesFirstThenI'llBeAbleToTellWhatDirectionTheInternetIsBackIn.Ok,IThinkThey'reThisWay.I'mGoingToTrustMyGutFeeling,ThisIsTheWayBack,I'llHitMyPileOfClothesSoon.ButWait,IWouldHaveHitThemByNow.Damn.OkDon'tPanic.Hey,WaitWhyDon'tIJustHitTheBackSpaceKeyOnMyLineOfTextAndFollowThatBack,ThatWouldWork.HoldOn,No.ThenIWouldBeErasingMyselfAsIWentBackAndWouldn'tExistAnymore.PlusThatDoesn'tMakeSense.Duh.GotToThinkLogically.Damn.ManIReallyHaveToTakeACrapToo.IReallyShouldn'tHaveHadThatBurritoBeforeILeft.Damn,I'mLost,I'mLost,I'mLost.Ok,JustKeepMoving.WhyDidIDoThis.ThereMustBeSomethingElseOutHere,Anybody,Something.I'llProbablyFindASkeleton.Damn,I'mJustGoingToKeepMoving.I'mBoundToHitSomethingOrSomebodyAtSomePoint.HeyIWonderIfIt'sLikeASphereOutHere.LikeI'mWalkingOnAPlanetShapeAndI'llEventuallyGoAllTheWayAroundItAndBackToTheInternet.LikeTheEarth,ButWaitThat'sHuge!SomeOfPluto'sMoonsAreRealSmall.What'sThatChildren'sStoryAboutThatLittlePrinceWhoLivedOnATinyPlanet.Oh,God,I'mScrewed.Ok,JustKeepMovingAndDon'tThinkOfThingsLikeThat!NotHelping,NotHelping.OrWait,What'sThatDoughnutTheoryThing.MaybeI'mOnTheInsideOfAFunnelOrATube,AndIt'sAllConnected.AndI'llGoBackAroundEventually.ButIDon'tKnowHowBigAndINeverUnderstoodThatTheory,Damn.Ohh,Wait,What'sThatStringThing.MaybeIShouldLookForAWormhole,NoThatWouldBeBadIThink.Ok,StopThinkingLikeThat.ThinkLogically.I'llFindMyWayBack.HeyWhatIfIEventuallyHitAnAlternateRealityVersionOfTheInternet.ThatWouldBeInteresting.ThatWouldBeFineWithMeAtThisPoint,Actually.I'llTakeAnAlternateInternet.Anything.God,I'mThirstyNow.AndIHaveToTakeADumpRealBad.Still.Ugh.WhyDon'tTheyHaveBathroomsPublicBathroomsOutHere.OhThatMakesSense.MaybeI'mDelirious.ThisIsSoNotFunny.God,YouKnowICouldJustBendOverAndTakeADumpRightHere,AndWho'sGonnaKnow.MaybeIShouldKeepGoingInstead.I'mSureEverythingWillBeOk.WowI'mWalkingReallyFast.ICan'tBelieveI'mNude.ThatWasSoStupid.ThisWholeThingIsSoStupid.Stupid,Stupid,Stupid!IShouldNeverHaveWanderedThisFarFromTheInternet!Stupid,Stupid,Stupid!AndI'mNude!ThisIsPathetic!God!Wow,IStillCan'tBelieveHowFastI'mWalking.ShouldIRunIWonder.ShouldIConserveMyEnergy.GodIWishIHadSomeWater,I'mSoThirsty.That'sIt,I'mJustGonnaSquatDownAndTakeADump,I'veReallyGottaGo.Ok,OhGodI'mActuallyLookingAroundLikeSomeoneMightSeeMe.Ok,BendDown.Unngh.GodIt'sHardToGo,IWishIHadSomePrivacyOrSomeWallsAroundMeOrSomething.Hello.Auuughhh!!!What!WhoIsThat.It'sMe.OhMyGod,WhatInTheHell,WhereDidYouComeFrom.WhatAreYouDoingBehindMe.WhatAreYouDoingSquattedDownLikeThat.I,Uh,Well,IDidn'tThinkAnyoneWasOutHere,AndIHadToGo,OhGodYouReallyFrightenedMe.I'mSorry.WhyAreYouTypingWithTheBoldTextKeyHeldDownLikeThat.ItHelpsMeGetMyPointAcross.Oh.WellI'mGladThough,I'mGladSomeone'sHere.WhereAreYourClothes.IGotRidOfThem,Before,IWasJustHavingAMoment,AndIKindOfFlungThemOffAndNowICan'tFindThem.IKnowIWasWatchingYouWhenYouDidThat.I,YouWere.WhatDoYouMeanYouWereWatchingMe.WhereWereYou.OhI'veBeenWatchingYouForAWhile.YouDid,ButHow.I'veBeenFollowingRightBehindYouForALongTime.What.WhyDidn'tISeeYou.IWasRightBehindYou,JustAFootOrTwo,BeingRealQuiet.JustFollowingAndWatching.Really.That'sKindOfWeird.OhIWasGoingToSayHelloEventually,ButIJustWantedToWatchYouForABit.Well,Whatever,I'mSoGladToFindSomeone.I'mLost.INeedToGetBackToTheInternet,IWasTypingAndRealizedICouldKindOfDriftOutHereAndIThoughtItWasNeatAtFirstAnd.OhIKnow.WhatDoYouMean.HowDoYouKnow.IDidTheVerySameThingMyselfYearsAgo.WhatDoYouMeanYearsAgo.I'veBeenOutHereAVeryLongTime.What,HowLong.OhIDon'tKnow,Years,MaybeADecade.IStoppedCounting.What!WhyHaven'tYouGoneBackToTheInternet.ICan'tFindIt.IStoppedLookingAltogetherYearsAgo.IDon'tBelieveThis!HowDoYouSurvive.Oh,IManage.When!When!How!OhIDidTheSameThingYouDid,InAWay.IUsedToGoToM.I.T.And,Well,It'sALongStory.ButHow!WhatDoYouEatOutHere!OhIFindStuff.Really,LikeWhat!Oh,Stuff.WellListen,INeedYourHelp.MaybeNowThatThere'sTwoOfUsNow,WeCanFindOurWayBackToTheInternet.No,ThatWon'tWork,TwoOrEvenThreePeopleWon'tWork.TrustMe,You'reNeverGettingBack.WhatDoYouMean!YouMeanYou'veTried!Sure.Wait,SoWhatDoYouMean,TheOthers!Others.YouKnow,OthersLikeUsOutHere.WellWhatHappenedToThem!Oh,They'reGoneNow.Huh!YouMean,What,DidTheyDie!Yes.WhatHappened!WhatDidYouDoAboutIt.What'sToDo.It'sAJungleOutHere.Yea.Listen,Um,IDon'tThinkINeedYourHelpAfterAll.I'mGonnaWalkInTheOtherDirectionNow.IThinkIKnowWhereTheInternetIsNow.You'llNeverFindIt.Yea,OhWell.I'mGonnaWalkThisOtherWayAnyway.ThanksForYourHelp,Bye.WhereAreYouGoing.ThisWay.That'sTheWrongWay,They'reAllTheWrongWay.Why!HowDoYouKnow!Oh,ForgetIt.TrustMe.ListenIWantToWalkAlone.Why.Don'tFollowMeLikeThat,Please,INeedToConcentrate.Why.INeedToGetBackToTheInternet.YouNeverWill.NoneOfTheOthersIMetOutHereEverDid.GetAwayFromMe!Why.What'sWrong.JustGetAway!WhyAreYouRunning.AreYouAfraid.Stop!StopFollowingMe!Help!Help!!WhoAreYouShoutingAt.There'sNoOneOutHereButUs.GetAway!No!What'sWrong.Stop!Auuuggghhh!GetOffOfMe!WhatAreYouDoing!HoldStill.Stop!OhMyGod!Help!Heeeeelp!!!StopFighting.It'llBeEasierThisWay.Help!!!OhMyGod,No!!!Heeeeeelp!!!Stop.Auuuuggghhhhh!!!Nooooooo!!!Auuugghhhh,eaaauuuugggh,gurgle,sputter,gag,eeauuugghh.There,See.ThatWasn'tBadWasIt.ThisIsABigOne.ItShouldLastForWeeks.Sigh,IWishThereWasSomethingElseToDoOutHereBesidesHuntForFood.EveryTimeIGetAnotherOneItMakesMeNostalgicForWhenIThoughtICouldGetBack.Can'tThough,Nope.GottaSurvive.There'llBeOthers.IJustWishThereWasSomethingOutHereToKillTheBoredom.

Comments

[Becky]

I'm sorry friend, in my universe, my browser auto-wraps your text. Just consider it the "Many Worlds Theory" of quantum mechanics. There are a multitude of universes, choices, options .. EVERYTHING with EVERY OPTION exists out there, somehow. Love from Becky, the armchair physicist

[jenjen]

I'll have what he's having.

[bartleby]

When this happens, the space bar breaks, what you can do is go into an old document and select a space between words then hit ctrl-c and then when you would ordinarily use the spacebar just hit ctrl-v.

[Rufus]

The lesson: Never leave the internet.

[de Culla]

Lovely.
You're a Promise and a Delight¡