Resident Clinton's Top 10 Places Visited in the US during 2007

1) THE HOUSE ON THE ROCK, Spring Green, Wisconsin

2) DETROIT METROPOLITAN AIRPORT LIGHT TUNNEL, Detroit, Michigan

3) THE HARVARD MUSEUM OF NATURAL HISTORY, Cambridge, Massachusetts

4) CASA BONITA, Denver, Colorado

5) CICADA INFESTATION, Chicago, Illinois

6) CONEY ISLAND, New York City

7) THE ORIGINAL ALAMO DRAFTHOUSE, Austin Texas

8) PIKE PLACE MARKET, Seattle, Washington

9) POWELL'S BOOKS, Portland, Oregon

10) RESTAURANT FLORENT, New York City

Details, videos and much more on all of the above after the jump.

1) THE HOUSE ON THE ROCK, Spring Green, Wisconsin

Website reviews can't do it justice, a ton of photos can't quite capture it, and even video footage doesn't really express the full awe of actually going into the House on the Rock. Perhaps the ultimate American roadside attraction, Alex Jordan's mind-boggling collection of collections would make PT Barnum green with envy. But it is the design of the place itself that is truly mind blowing. From the original bachelor pad style house, featuring the dizzying infinity room, one then proceeds through a series of warehouse sized rooms, each one just a bit more amazing than the last.

Looking for an indoor city filled with mechanical orchestras? Check. A four story whale eating a tiny fishing boat in a room filled with nautical treasures? Check. How about the world's brightest carousel filled completely with hand-carved mythical creatures (as featured in Neil Gaiman's book American Gods)? Check. And just when you think the grandeur has done you in, you head to what appears to be a demure bathroom and instead find yourself at a cliff side urinal being stared down upon by angry stuffed bears. And all of it was designed and carefully planned by one outrageous man with an unstoppable passion and a great eye for detail.

More than just an attraction, the House on the Rock is like a multi-acre mixed-media sculpture. Yeah, the phrase "jaw-dropping" doesn't even cover it. Just go, already.

And even though video can't really capture the place, here is a collection of a few of the quickie video images I took while visiting...including a finale from a patron who was so freaked out by the giant whale that she couldn't even hold her crippling fear intact.

2) DETROIT METROPOLITAN AIRPORT LIGHT TUNNEL, Detroit, Michigan

I had to spend several trips wandering through DTW, but it is one of the few airports I actually found to be quite pleasing. It barely edges out Portland International Airport and becomes my favorite layover spot because of the hypnotic moving walkway between concourses B and C. Along this long underground passage, glass artist Laurel Fyfe has created a series of swirling colored lights choreographed to accompany soothing synth music. Sounds like an Enya nightmare, right? But the effect is actually quite pleasing and relaxing...until it turns into a glorious Tim Burton style freak-out.

3) THE HARVARD MUSEUM OF NATURAL HISTORY, Cambridge, Massachusetts

I lived in Boston for many years, and the Harvard Museum of Natural History was always a favorite. But since living in New York and spending many many hours at our own American Museum of Natural History, I've come to appreciate it a bit more. Where in NYC we have splendor and grandeur (and that completely amazing Hall of Ocean Life), at Harvard many of the same taxidermied animals, fossils, and gems are contained in a demure and stuffy old curiosity cabinet of a museum. The museum opened to the public in 1995, combining three century-old collections that were previously known only to the ivy league. Because the collections are so old, and kept mostly in their original displays, the place feels timeless. Wandering the museum's cramped, old-world halls is a decidedly more personal experience than the more grand museums can offer.

My personal favorite area is the Museum of Comparative Zoology, where you can feel like you are the only one to ever gaze upon so many stuffed and mounted bird specimens, or to notice that there is a jar of tapeworms from the wealthiest patients on Beacon Hill, or to just sit in the balcony and gaze out over all the wood and glass framed display boxes filled with a seemingly random assortment of animals (no habitat displays here, thank you). Oh yeah, and dinosaur bones, of course, and on a much smaller and more intimate scale than any other exhibit I've seen.

Then there is the hermetically sealed Botanical Museum, which contains thousands of hand-made blown-glass reproductions of plant life, all made by a father and son team in Dresden between 1887 and 1936. I don't have any interest in Botany whatsoever, but even this room captured my attention for an hour.

And finally, for rock lovers, the Mineralogical and Geological Museum features a bevy of sparkling, glimmering, crystalline objects as well as some meteorites from outer space.

4) CASA BONITA, Denver, Colorado

Have you seen that South Park episode where Cartman wants to go to Casa Bonita so bad that he kidnaps Butters so he can take his place?

Well, not only is Casa Bonita a real place, but that kind of reaction by kids is NOT an exaggeration. As a child growing up in the Denver area, Casa Bonita was like mecca. A sprawling indoor restaurant featuring the landscape of a Mexican villa at night, a gold mine and underground cave, a palatial theatre where magicians entertain, and the mother-load of them all, a 30 foot waterfall where cliff-divers periodically jump into the tiny pool below. Add to that wandering mariachi bands, Black Bart's Cave (see video below), and a puppet theatre looked over by a grinning skull, and you have Paradise On Earth.

Then you grow up. As a teenager I worked at Casa Bonita and learned many of its secrets: what the place looks like under bright light, that the cliff divers are mostly high-school dorks, and how the food is gosh-darned awful. Because, honestly, nobody goes there for the food.

This year, well into my 30s, I returned again, with a whole gaggle of friends. And I discovered that it is still fun, but in a wholly different way. Once there were many Casa Bonitas (Oklahoma City had the first), now the last one desperately clings to life as the corner stone of a mostly abandoned strip-mall in suburban west Denver. Instead of being a fantasy version of Mexico, it is turning into a kiddie Tijuana. Where things once felt grand, they are now dull and dingy, and the stuffed remains of gold miner animatrons sit lifeless and pelted with Sweet N Low packets. Or maybe it's always been that way and I'm just getting older and can see past the glimmer. Either way, Casa Bonita is a family restaurant where a man in a gorilla suit and "jams" is considered to be the pinnacle of high entertainment. That says it all, really. And yes, I will go back there again - even if only for the sopapillas. 

A family hits Black Bart's cave, via YouTube.

5) CICADA INFESTATION, Chicago, Illinois

Starting just outside of O'Hare Airport and stretching up along the western side of Chicago lies the just one large chunk of the Cook County Forest Preserves, the largest urban conservation preserves in the country. Many tourists just drive past, wondering why there is this all this wild open space between getting off the plane and actually being in the city. But pull off to the side for a while, and you can spend several days wandering serene paths of trees and plants. Whatever. Like I have time for that.

But then, speeding by on the highway, I couldn't help but hear a siren's call - or rather an incredibly loud screeching from the trees that did inspire me to finally pull over. It was the mating song of the cicada. From May through July this year, the cicadas of Brood XIII invaded Chicago for their once-every-17-years music festival. While these little buggers were popping up in gardens and parks all over the state, it was here between O'Hare and downtown Chicago that we discovered a truly spectacular and unexpected sight: a forest littered with molting shells on every leaf and branch, while the ground was filled with crazed humping cicadas. It was worth the trip to Chi-town just for that.   

Hear cicadas in action.

6) CONEY ISLAND, New York City

What can I say about Coney Island? After reading Kevin Baker's Dreamland, it became the first place I absolutely had to visit when I moved to New York, and I spent most of the summer of 2006 volunteering for Coney Island, USA. Coney Island "mayor" Dick Zigun is a heckuva nice guy, and I tell you, friends, there is nothing like the feeling of getting stoned with the freaks and skinny dipping at 3am on the Coney Island beach. This year marks the first time I was able to explore Coney Island Creek and its collection of slumbering boat shells and abandoned piers. The fabulous folks at Ars Subterranea arranged a weekend tea party on the old ruins, and it was a delightful day of tasty treats and tetanus shots.

Coney Island also made my list because I discovered that the end of the fishing pier, looking back at the shore, is possibly the best place I know of for a first kiss. And since the amusement parks were given a reprieve for one more sad summer before being turned into a huge indoor complex of lameness, time isn't up quite yet. Besides, no matter what happens, nothing can kill the indomitable spirit of the Mermaid Parade.

Here's a photo montage I made of my friend's summer visit to Coney, set to Tom Waits' "Coney Island Baby". A bit home movie-ish, but I hope you like the sentiment.

7) THE ORIGINAL ALAMO DRAFTHOUSE, Austin Texas

I actually haven't been to the Alamo Drafthouse, but it is one of the reasons I am planning a trip to Austin. Nowhere else in the country have I found a theatre that has such a non-stop program of fun. From serving Spaghetti during A Fistful of Dollars, to playing films at the location they were shot (Repo Man at a car lot in LA, anyone?). From encouraging a whole audience to sing along to the worst boy band videos, to forcing people to ride around town in a school bus while watching old educational films. Oh yeah, and let's not forget Quentin Tarantino's annual 24 hour grindhouse movie marathon, the talents and enthusiasm of the prestigious Austin filmmaking scene, as well as a close enough proximity to LA to lure all manner of celebrities to town (the weirder the better, of course). Put them all together, and no other movie theatre has quite explored the boundaries of entertainment like the Alamo.

While their franchises and other "drafthouses" merely show movies with beer, the original theatre in downtown Austin still brings out the crazy fun. This year, they were forced to abandon their original location on Coronado Street when the rent skyrocketed. But instead of folding up and going home they built and bigger and better Drafthouse, renovating a historic theatre, where the Music Mondays and free Wednesday midnight movies continue. 

And don't miss their annual Air Sex competition, whose winner last year was the hilarious "George Bush Fucks the World". (Video NSFW!)

8) PIKE PLACE MARKET, Seattle, Washington

By all rights, I should hate this place, because I have seen the "real" Seattle, and this is "tourist" Seattle. But I don't hate the Pike Place Market. Dating from 1907, it really is a throwback to the traditional town marketplace - where dealers in all variety of goods gather to hawk their wares directly to the public without the expensive middle-man. Even though it is a huge destination spot, those forward thinking Seattle folks have kept the chains away, keeping the mom and pop attitude (and even providing low income housing). So, instead of refashioning a classic space into a tacky trap with yet another Abercrombie & Fitch (like, say, NYCs own "rejuvenated" South Street Seaport), the Pike Place Market complex not only retains its original maze-like layout, but still features many unique shops found only there. The top floor features fresh groceries and fish throwers, while the cavernous lower levels are jam-packed with stores of random antiques, ephemera, and terrible crafts (though charming in that setting). Where else can you find a classic dusty magic shop, a store filled with just wind up toys, a legendary head shop (if that's your thing), a great comic shop and geek store, and the Left Bank Books Collective, a treasure trove of zines, self-publishing, anarchism, and conspiracy theories. Then, sometimes, zombies show up and do the Thriller dance (part of a record-book flash mob that took over the town last October). Oh yeah, there is one chain: Starbucks. But in all fairness, this is the original store, opened in 1976. Now they would be considered the enemy.

9) POWELL'S BOOKS, Portland, Oregon

People rave and rave about the Strand, but as a bookstore it just feels a bit impersonal and too rushed. But it is hard to deny that selection, and that's what keeps me going in there. But then on a recent trip to Portland I finally made it into the legendary Powell's Books. And here they manage to pull off a mean feat - combining a mind-boggling selection of new and used books, with the homey, friendly feel of a neighborhood book shop. Each room of it's four floors has a distinct personality, so in a fashion it is like visiting a whole variety of smaller stores. Thus, they are known less as a store, and more as a "City of Books". So, one whole day browsing the shelves and an armful of books that I couldn't fit in my luggage later, I finally had to admit that it was probably my favorite bookstore in the country. Bonus: their fold out store map designed to look like an old paperback is actually nice enough to bother taking home.

10) RESTAURANT FLORENT, New York City

As a recent transplant to the city I hadn't heard about perhaps the best restaurant in town until a friend told me to check it out. She didn't tell me about the decor or the food or anything, she merely stated that it is "the best place on the planet". And sure enough after my first visit I was hooked.

If you don't know Florent, it is a 24 hour French bistro located in the meat packing district. Now it is in the middle of one of New York's most "fashionable" areas, but when Florent opened there was nobody even near the neighborhood besides the actual meat packers and late night vice trollers.

What makes Florent so special is not just the food (Haricots Verts!), which is always amazing and much better for you at 4am than any other place in town. Nor is it the atmosphere, a timeless diner style with a touch of the absurd and a staff that are super friendly. Nor is it even that the owner, Florent Morellet, is an extravagant drag queen who supports pretty much every good community cause that there is, and is still there in person many a night. It is the combination of all these things, which in turn makes the restaurant a city oasis, a home away from home, and all those other comforting cliches. As Hal Rubenstein once wrote, it is a place where "butchers, beauties, barkeeps, and bone-marrow transplantees feel equally comfortable".

This year Florent turned 20, and the celebration that ensued was certainly worth the fuss. Check out the history, stop by, grab a bite, and pick up the free newspaper they published just for the anniversary. And don't forget to stop by in July for the annual Bastille Day festival. 

Comments

[milesahead]

I have gone through the Detroit Airport Light Tunnel a few times in the last month or two and yes, Enya crossed my mind. And the old 60's era neon light show that used to be at O'Hare (please tell me that's gone by now). I had no idea that I was travelling through such a wonderful piece of living art. I must have been tired. Actually I nearly fell asleep on the moving walkway. Those things are HUGE.

[toober]

Nice list! It has been years since I went to House on the Rock, and I hear they have fixed it up recently. Yes, folks, there is interesting stuff in Wisconsin.

And cicadas. I grew up at ground zero for the cicada blast. These things not only were in the forests, but anywhere there are trees. Chicago, and many of the suburbs, has many trees - thus many cicadas spread all over the place. They actually come every year, with some broods (like the one you saw) being magnitudes larger than others. If you are lucky, like me, you can witness a double dose, when a big 17 year brood pops up along with a big 11 year brood. I was a kid, but still remember natural chitin-banks of shells swept up by the wind. My poor cat lost his mind with so many targets and toys. Cars would skid to stop signs. And something that was louder than the 737s at O'Hare that passed right over the house. The weird thing is you could walk a couple of blocks and there would be no cicadas at all. Very localized.

[Parq]

1) OMG, The House on the Cliff looks like the coolest place in the world! And there's even a Neil Gaiman connection, which will help get my kid interested. I'm going to start planning a trip immediately.

2) I started going to Coney as soon as I got to NYC too, and my wife and I made it one of our Special Places a long time ago. So yes, I very much appreciated the sentiment. Long may it wave.

3) I dug Pike's Place too, precisely because there is narry a Victoria's Secret or Sharper Image in sight (South Street Seaport is one of the most cynical things Koch ever did to NYC). Yes, there's a Starbuck's, but it's the *original* Starbuck's, and it doesn't even look like one (although I still opted to give it a miss.) Clint, I hope you got to the Archie McPhee store in the Ballard nabe - what the consumer culture would be if WFMUers ruled the world. Also, Gasworks Park makes for some pretty cool chilling.

[h.d]

thanks for that house on the rock video... you nailed the overall feeling of that carousel room exactly; hypnotic discordant sounds, red, flashing lights, terrifying wooden animals and shitty manikin angels ... need to go back someday! agreed on pike place market too -- it's schmaltzy & smelly but wunnerful