WFMU's Beware of the Blog

Recent Faves From the New Bin

While Arrington de Dionyso's Old Time Relijun (who played a 2007 WFMU Free Music Concert show at Southpaw in Brooklyn) has always  had its poetic/jazz-punk leanings in similar terrain as the likes of Blurt, it's always been interesting to see what AdD has gotten up to on his own. In 2001 his Abraxasaxophonic release basically allowed Arrington's sax squall to lock horns (violently) with actual lite-FM jazz recordings running simultaneously in the background to a most pleasing if not disorienting result, though his collaboration with Thollem McDonas, Intuition, Science, and Sex (Edgetone Records) breathes a less perverse air while still stepping sideways of traditional jazz genre-lock. With McDonas on beatup piano in an airy room, de Dionyso's bass clarinet froths in an ominous, though far from assaultive drone; if anything it conjures up a humid bog complete with some meditative off-kilter ivory tinkling planted firmly in some righteous mud to appease the groaning creatures in the surrounding muck. Closer "An Eye" (Real Audio) starts to rustle the stray gunk together a bit heavier than the rest of the disc, but recedes into a harmonium-like finale.

Another splinter-off project making some good noise is Cave, sprung from post-rock-metal-whatsiz unit Warhammer 48K. On an LP compiling two EPs Hunt Like the Devil/Jamz (Permanent Records), shifting metrics of gunky synths, repetitive basslines and overall astral-gazing permeate these grooves in abundance. If Oneida were devoid of a bit of their precision and sprawled in a way to let figures tumble over into each other more often you might get an idea of what Cave were up to rhythmically, but it's when the guitars start to go into acid rampage mode is when I really get interested. Once they start cooking there's some comparisons to Comets on Fire, Titan, or the Heads, but in some ways it still resides  in some of the safer zones of a number of the Can-worship types who take it all a bit too literally. Which isn't to say it's a bad thing; there are plenty of surprises and sharp turns going on in the studio which make these two EPs diverse, I guess I'd like to hear the production a little rougher around the edges and let certain elements come unhinged a bit more, but again, pretty nice listening. "Hunt Like Devil" (Real Audio).

Reading in Someone Else's Voice

If you're like me, you hear voices when you read.  If you're familiar with the author and his or her tone, you hear a familiar voice; if not, or if the piece is anonymous, the right voice gradually develops - and it is most definitely an audible sensation.  So it can really fuck you up when you think you're reading one person's words but you're actually reading another's.  I had just such an unsettling experience earlier this week while reading this blog recap of Billy Jam's excellent live-at-the-Knitting Factory radio show from May 23rd.  I made the mistake (which I often do) of looking to see who posted it before reading it.  Liz Berg posted it, so I heard Liz Berg's authorial voice as I read it.  I missed the crucial "Billy Jam says:" way up at the top of the thing.  Hearing Billy Jam's words in Liz Berg's voice (and not knowing it), I actually felt a bit of planetary shift in my confusion - it was just all wrong!  Sure, there are probably greater distances than the one between Billy's and Liz's blogging / speaking / writing styles, but theirs still packs a disorienting wallop.  The closest comparable experience I can think of is a bad acid trip in the company of a couple who're fighting, to a soundtrack of "The Above Ground Sound of Jake Holmes".  Been there, brothers and sisters - great music, nice people, baaad trip!

Or I can share the experience.  Jump the flip to enjoy four very distinct New York newspapers reviewing one egregiously New York-identifying movie with legs as unbreakable as the presidential campaign of one New York senator.  All four reviews appear (in excerpted form) anonymously, so as to maximize your potential to confuse, say, New York for the New Yorker, or the News for the Post.  (The Times chose to remain above it all, natch.)

I hate people who use "natch" in conversation - if there's an "ersatz" to follow, then I declare this post hijacked!

Sony's Solution to Record Sale Drops: Sell Expensive Artist Photos

Idolator's Anthony Miccio has brought attention to the fact that Sony has started Icon Collectables, a boutique business dedicated to selling high-quality art repros of photographs of artists in the Columbia roster, ranging from $300 to $1,700. $1,500 will get you a black and white, 16" x 20" "Johnny Cash Portrait of Brooding Intensity" while a max $749 nabs you repro of the proofs of Billy Joel posing in 12 different shots for The Stranger cover. The selling point: "We all have a face that we hide away forever and we take them out and show ourselves when everyone has gone," sings Billy on the album's title track. Here, like frames from a film, are 12 sequential images from "The Stranger" cover shoot, many of them formerly unseen, each offering a different perspective on the mysteries of "The Stranger." You can also notice the red mark which designates the actual chosen cover." Really, not one Jim Flora print in the basement at the label? Maybe behind the extra cartons of Savage Garden LPs? And where the hell is the commemorative print of Eddie Murphy recording "Party All the Time"? Don Fleming smoking up during the Gumball sessions?

To me, it makes much more sense to head down to the Varvatos gallery and grab some $120 Columbia 1980's LPs to frame. 

Negative Approach at WFMU

(Photo: Brooklyn Vegan) Back in the late 80's I walked into the Ritz in the middle of the Laughing Hyenas and watched in disbelief while singer John Brannon churned out one hell of a gutteral yowl for the duration of a whole set in almost inhuman fashion. The Hyenas channelled extreme rage through total Stooge/primal Alice Cooper mode with a somewhat bluesy Birthday Party swagger, and eventually I learned he fronted Detroit's hardcore godfathers Negative Approach in the early part of that decade. Later it all came into focus: NA were very much first-wave and represented Detroit as one of the pockets dotted around the USA (see Black Flag, Minor Threat, Bad Brains), with Brannon & company consolidating the midwest brotherhood with the Necros and Meatmen and eventually moving into early singles via Corey Rusk's Touch and Go label (originally a zine, where yes, people learned of the underground way before the internet). As far as first-wave HC goes, Negative Approach were among the most vicious feedback-pummel units going. Songs careened by in seconds, were pretty much politics-free, focusing on sheer vocal/instrumental destruction. They were inspired by not only their American peers, but UK groundbreakers like Discharge (who, like, NA, were big Stooges fans). In 2006 they returned to the stage at the Touch and Go label anniversary, with Brannon and original drummer Chris Moore augmented by Ron Sakowski on bass and Harold Richardson on guitar, reportedly wiped the place down. On the day of their recent Southpaw show, they amazingly agreed in a day's notice to come down to my show on FMU, plugged in and turned us to mush with 16 songs in 25 minutes.

Negative Approach live on WFMU 5/14/08 (broadcast 5/27). Host: Brian Turner, engineer: Richard Rusinkovich (edited-for-FCC version appeared over air). Co-interviewer: Tony Rettman. Ken Freedman shot video of "Hypocrite" and "Dead Stop".

Set list: Lost Cause / Can't Tell No One / Sick of Talk / Hypocrite / Dead Stop / Whatever I Do / Tied Down / Evacuate / Your Mistake / Why Be Something That You're Not / Pressure / Fair Warning / Nothing / Borstal Breakout (Sham 69) / Never Surrender (Blitz) /Solitary Confinement.

Whole session in one shot here (MP3)

The live audio in this post is licensed under a Creative Commons
Attribution-NonCommercial-Share Alike 3.0 license

Ludovic Levasseur's Flesh Dolls

Ludovic Levasseur's Poupees Viandes (headstock meats?) series features the cutest and most disgustingly grotesque flesh dolls. The portraits above are only a small sampling of the wasted flesh and deformation. View all dolls at his Flickr gallery.

link via Monster Brains

Great Moments in WFMU History #31

Irate Volunteer - by Ken Freedman and Liz Berg

The therapist for a man suffering a significant degree of brain damage from an auto accident contacted Station Manager Ken Freedman, wanting to set up volunteer hours for the music-loving patient as part of his recovery. Ken was happy to comply, and had the volunteer re-alphabetize records in the WFMU library once a week. Staff members quickly learned that the volunteer was not able to form any new short-term memories due to his condition.

Every week as DJ Bart Plantegna prepared for his experimental sound collage program, the volunteer would refile records, and go into fits about how he hated what Bart was listening to. He’d get angry and yell “What the hell is this horrible music? This is crap!” and “Where am I? This noise is awful!” The therapist would calm him down for a bit, but then after a few minutes, he’d go back into the same tirade all over again, since he didn’t remember going through it the first time. After 6 weeks of these repeated outbursts, the doctor decided that perhaps WFMU was counter-therapeutic.

Illustration by Mark Kaufman

 

42 Versions of Harlem Nocturne

This week saw the passing of the great Earle Hagen. His name may not be a household word, but his music is burned into your brain. He was a TV theme writer extraordinaire, whose credits include catchy ditties for The Andy Griffith Show, The Dick Van Dyke Show, That Girl, and The Mod Squad to name a few. A bunch of his themes are available at AM Then FM's Hagen tribute post.

Hagen is also the composer behind "Harlem Nocturne", probably one of the most covered saxaphone songs in history (500 versions so far and counting). Writen in 1939 while Hagen was an arranger with the Ray Noble Orchestra, the song has lived on as a standard for every big band, bar band, R&B band, and instrumental band since. It is also of course a crime soundtrack staple.

Here are just a few versions of this song. First the bigger hits:
The Randy Brooks Orchestra regularly used it song as his theme song (1941)
Johnny Otis recorded it as an early single on Savoy (1945)
Herbie Fields made the first popular jazz version (1953)
and of course The Viscounts charted the highest with their guitar-driven hit version (1959)

And now for a few of the many many other Harlem Nocturnes, ranging from your standards to vocal versions to adaptations in classical, disco, a cappella, post-punk, exotica, organ, surf, ska, and what-have-you. This is one versatile song!   

Ray Anthony  |   Rene Bloch  |   Earl Bostic  |  Les Brown & His Band Of Renown  |   Chakachas  |   The Jake Concepcion Orchestra  |   Bill Doggett  |   Terry Edwards & the Scapegoats (paired with Lydia Lunch's "Cesspool Called History")  |   Les & Larry Elgart  |   Esquivel  |   Harold Faltermeyer (from the Tango & Cash soundtrack)  |  Flat Duo Jets  |   Illinois Jacquet  |  Quincy Jones  |  The Knickerbockers  |   Kustomized  |   Neil Lewis & His Quintet  |   Michael Lington  |   The Lounge Lizards  |   Herbie Mann  |   Charlie Musselwhite |   New York Ska-Jazz Ensemble  |   Louis Prima & Sam Butera  |   Quartet San Francisco  |   Boots Randolph  |   Brian Rodwell (at the Wurlitzer organ)  |   Vladimir Rusinov & The Jumping Cats  |   Stouxingers  |   Sam Taylor  |   Mel Taylor & The Magics  |   Mel Torme  |   Ulrich Tukur + Rhythm Boys  |   Archie Ulm  |   The Ventures  |   Carla White  |   Wildflower

Also, a simple Ukulele version via this YouTube user.

And let's not forget the Mike Hammer Theme (post prison cheesy 80s version).

It's a Wonderful New Woman's World (mp3s)

1. Overture (2:59)
2. It's a Wonderful New Woman's World (2:13)
3. Sing Along Instrumental (2:08)
4. Children's Vocal (2:14)
5. Rock Instrumental (1:32)
6. International (5:57)
7. It's a Wonderful New Bestline World (2:14)
8. How to Book a Bestline Party (7:30)

Ladies, it's 1970. Everyone's telling you that staying at home to raise a family makes you a square. You'd like the extra money, but hubby wants his dinner on the table and the kids need help with homework. How can you possibly have the best of both worlds?

Home sales, of course. And if you thought that Tupperware, Avon and Amway were your only choices, you haven't heard of Bestline. Not only will you be selling some of the best cleaning products on the market, but they're all biodegradable, putting you ahead of the green movement by about three decades.

All of this pales, however, to the most incredible gift that any working saleswoman could ever hope to receive...

The Duck Suit Chronicles

Scraping around from one odd job to another lately has me pondering this burning question: what was the crummiest job I ever held down? Was it the "candid camera" photography counselor gig at Breezemont Day Camp? Maybe it was the Sears paint department in the ghetto end of Bridgeport, Connecticut; clip-on tie and a tan badge that proclaimed, "Welcome to the Friendly World of Sears – DAVID A. – Courtesy is Caring," and beneath the badge was a ribbon that begged, "ASK ME TO ASK YOU." Perhaps the worst job was at the Evil Retro Record Store in Chelsea. Or that one fateful night at the Hagaan Dazs in the West Village. Or that one night busing tables at Fitzwillies. Or that one night busing tables at Figaro's. Or that one hour working the register at Conran's. Or that sub-zero New Years Eve job tossing confetti off a building in Times Square (the boss' name was Treb Hiney). Or that sweltering summer delivering helium balloons. Or that high-end house wares inventory job that was run by a crazy ex-Kennedy in-law. Or the seven years at the stupid vintage clothing store. Or nine freakin' years at the Harris Poll. All jobs. All crummy. However only one of these aforementioned positions required the daily use of a duck suit. And if you guessed Sears, you're wrong.

Summer of 1981: I'm nineteen, disillusioned, and my only immediate plan for the future is to be a Good Humor Man. How many of you know that ice cream trucks have to be plugged in all night to recharge the refrigerator? I didn't know that either and that's why my frozen ice cream dreams were rapidly dashed asunder. Living on the second floor and dealing with multiple extension cords down to a parking space was more than my teenaged attention span could handle. I checked the Bridgeport Post (or Telegram? Or whatever the hell it was) again. Balloon delivery job? I'm your man. I mean, I'm your duck. It appeared that getting together my sixty dollar a month rent nut would require drastic measures.

Sensei Rebel's Archive Picks of the Week (May 19 - 25, 2008)

All MP3 and RealAudio links are streaming links from the WFMU archives.

Rock And Roll
Supercar - "Lucky" RealAudio from Ken's show

International
Count Lasher's Calypso Quintet - "Dalvey Gal Parson" RealAudio from Woody's show

Experimental
Geza X - "Rio Grande Hotel" RealAudio from Brian Turner's show
Misty Roses - "Monster Zero" RealAudio from Irene Trudel's show

Dance
Wild Sugar - "Bring It Here" RealAudio from Woody's show
Garnett Silk - "Complaint (Penthouse Mix)" RealAudio from Nickel And Dime Radio with $mall Change

Hip-Hop
MC Shan - "The Bridge" RealAudio from Put the Needle On the Record with Billy Jam

Fave Songs of the Week
Penguin Cafe Orchestra - "Telephone And Rubber Band" RealAudio from Scott Williams' show
Lyrics Born - "Did You Buy This" RealAudio from (More Than A Few) Exciting Moments with Frank O'Toole (Web-only show)
Pharoah Roche - "Swing A Right Hook" RealAudio from Ken's show
Satanicpornocultshop - "Chanson D'Amour 1 by Catherine Ferroyer Blanchard" RealAudio from Maria Levitsky's show

DoseOne serves Bisc-1 and Broke MC in WFMU freestyle battle

Billy Jam says:

"You've been served" could well have been the title of one of the highlights of last Friday afternoon's WFMU remote broadcast from the Knitting Factory. DoseOne (rock band Subtle's main man, Anticon co-founder, and longtime battle rapper) did an on-the-spot freestyle followed by an impromptu rap battle with two other MC guests in the downtown Manhattan club, NYC's Bisc-1 and Broke MC.

All involved were good sports, and DoseOne (left) (whose battling days date back to the mid-nineties when he would take on the likes of a then unknown Eminem at the Scribble Jam in Ohio) was the clear winner as he served both NYC emcees (my opinion). In fact, DoseOne was so superior that he took on both opponents at once. And not only that, but he remained seated the entire time he (lyrically) demolished both Bisc-1 and Broke MC.

If you didn't hear the battle live, check it out in the WFMU archives ( real audio | MP3 ), and you be the judge. Post your views on the battle and how you think it went in the "comments" below. Meanwhile, check out DoseOne's interview and freestyle ( real audio | MP3 ), and the rest of the remote broadcast out of the Knitting Factory last Friday (a first one done through a laptop - thanks Ken and Bill Bowen). Other highlights included Clay Pigeon (right, from The Dusty Show) outside doing some great man-on-the-street interviews.

Wings of the Delirious Demon

Speaking of clarinets, last week's post prompted me to pull out what I thought was one of my favorite (only?) processed clarinet records, Ilhan Mimaroğlu's Wings of the Delirious Demon (and Other Electronic Works).  But now I'm not sure if it's even clarinets that are getting the sonic screw or not, such is the decomposition occurring in the grooves. 

Turkish composer Mimaroğlu was a pioneer of analog synth and tape experiments and affiliated with the Columbia/Princeton Electronic Music Center.  He also was a radio DJ at WBAI for several years and produced jazz records for Atlantic, a relationship that culminated in his collaboration with Freddie Hubbard on the twisted album "Sing Me a Song of Songmy" (which has been played quite a few times on WFMU).  Wings of the Delirious Demon was originally released in 1971 on Mimaroğlu's Finnadar imprint, a killer label which also released music by Stockhausen, John Cage, Eric Salzman and Jean DuBuffet, among others.  To my knowledge Wings has never been officially reissued, but was given the Dolor del Estamago treatment a few years back. 

Ilhan Mimaroğlu - Wings of the Delirious Demon

Nails Did.

Considering this explosive newsbreak in nail trends, we are reminded that it's once again the season for obsessing over the keratinous growths on the ends of our fingers and toes. The inevitable question comes up: What's hot for summer? The answer remains as transitory as fashion itself. The Celeb Set is all over the Neon Pink, while fashionista writers are screaming that Spring's navy blue trend has definitely gone the way of turquoise and other blue variations. There is however, no accounting for taste when such dictums invariable trickle and triple-filter down to the masses. Judge not ye ghetto nails, lest your own nasty nails be judged:

The Return of Weekly WFMU Auctions!

I bet you thought our supply of splendid stuff to auction on eBay had dried up.  How else to explain the prolonged absence of recorded rarities, autographed artifacts and other useless items offered up by us to separate you from your ill-earned cash?

No, there are still plenty of treasures in the box that sits on top of the filing cabinet that rests in the penthouse of WFMU's luxuriously appointed headquarters.  The box that has a label that says "Wendy" on it.  Yup, lots of stuff in that box.

But for the better part of the year, there was no Wendy.

Well, yes there was.  I didn't cease to exist; I just lived too far away from Jersey City to coax those items onto eBay.

Now I'm back.

Let the bidding begin.

1. So are you all excited about the free concert coming up on July 4th?  You know, the one that's part of WFMU's Free Concert Music Series?  The one with Sonic Youth and The Feelies?  (If you have no idea what I'm talking writing about, go here.)

If you need a little extra encouragement on the excitement-o-meter, may I suggest this. 

Yes, it's "Crazy Rhythms" by The Feelies.  On glorious vinyl.  With the original inner sleeve.  And it's in beautiful condition. 

If you are the highest bidder, and you don't lollygag on paying us, you'll get the LP with plenty of time to play it over and over and over while practicing all your dance moves in the privacy of your own home so you will only look slightly like a dork at the show on July 4th.

2. Speaking of dorks, if you were one of those comic book dorks back in the 80s...
But wait, they call them "Graphic Novels" now, and only the very cool kids are into the ones not starring superheroes.

Right.

If you were one of those ahead-of-your-time Graphic Novel readers back in the 80s, Love & Rockets does not equal that poppy, glammish result of when Bauhaus met the wrecking ball.

No, Love & Rockets equals Los Bros Hernandez.

And we've got the very first issue.  Yes, Issue #1.
Holy crap!

This isn't one of those collections.  This is the actual first issue, with a business card from some guy at Fantagraphics stapled to the front cover.  There's only one staple holding the card there so you can easily remove it.

3. From the Arcane Audiophile Department, we offer an actual 78 rpm record, this one by the Mr. King of the Swingers, Louis Prima.

Side A is "Marguerita" and the other side is "Bridget O'Brien."

Both the wax and the labels are in lovely condition, perfect for playing, framing, or just nailing right into the wall.

Crank up those old Victrolas and let the dance party begin.  Hey, if the oil crisis really becomes a crisis on these shores, you might be the only one in your block, building or neighborhood to have some semblance of a stereo.

The smart bidder will snatch it up before the Ol' Codger figures out how to turn on a computer and beats you to it.

So that's it for this week's eBay offerings.  Support freeform radio!  Support WFMU!   

 

   

Nick Tosches and Allan Melvin: Same Guy?

Doing research for a recent post about country/twist records, I pulled from the bookshelf my copy of Nick Tosches'  "The Unsung Heroes of Rock 'n' Roll."  A trip to this particular corner of the library also induced me to pick up and flip through "Where Dead Voices Gather," Tosches' 2001 biography of Georgia-born minstrel singer Emmett Miller, where I spied the author's dust-jacket portrait, which can be seen above left.  That's Allan Melvin on the right.

Despite having seen Tosches' photo many times before, I was suddenly struck by his close resemblance to the hilarious character actor Allan Melvin, who died about five months ago just shy of his 85th birthday.  Melvin was a TV regular for several decades.  By the time he landed the role of Sgt. Charley Hacker on Gomer Pyle, USMC, he had already appeared on The Phil Silvers Show (known as Sgt. Bilko in syndication), Route 66, McHale's Navy, The Andy Griffith Show, and The Dick Van Dyke Show to name but a few.  His work as the scheming Sgt. Hacker on Gomer Pyle will always be regarded as his finest role, at least in my house.  The character of Sgt. Hacker had but one purpose on the show and that was to serve as a foil for Gomer's perpetually beleaguered commanding officer, Sgt. Carter (played by the great Frank Sutton, a gifted comedic actor himself).  Here's something you can take to the bank: anytime you see Sgt. Hacker in a given episode, watching it will be time well-spent.  Here's a link to a YouTube clip of Allan Melvin in action as Sgt. Hacker.

After the jump: a plea for author Nick Tosches to be less of a show-off.

The Grainy, Xeroxed Pages of My 9th Grade "New Wave" Fanzine

Are you ready for some nostalgic "ha-ha's" at my expense? Embarrassing ones? Good. Way back in 1980/81, my 9th grade friend Curtis and I made a Xeroxed cut-and-paste "New Wave" magazine called Propaganda, and gave it away to all of our friends at Clark High School in Plano, Texas (click below to see each page). I had forgotten about it until a few years ago when somebody sent me copies of some of the pages they'd stashed away (which were already copies of copies of copies). The pages were washed out, gritty and hard to decipher, but I definitely remembered the whole thing. Then I forgot about it again. But recently, someone sent me crisp scans from some of the original "master" pages, which look even better than the original photocopies probably did (what is it about Xerox paper that doesn't ever yellow, even after a quarter of a century?) Now, kick and scream as I click and drag you through my cut and paste past...

Foot Village live at WFMU (Video) (MP3s)

DJ Marty McSorley aired a live session from Foot Village on his show last night/this morning, and we've got the a/v!

Foot Village preview

(edited by Scott. More video + photos after the jump!)

Foot Village is a nation-building group consisting of Citizen Miller on drums, Citizen Taylor on drums, Citizen Rowan on drums, and Citizen Lee on, uh, drums. Lee also sports a megaphone (the only piece of electricity) while they all yell like meth-fueled rebel-cheerleaders hijacking the marching band drumline. Foot Village contains two  Gang Wizards and one Friend Forever, and their new disc Friendship Nation comes with remixes by fellow LA-area ruckus-bringers Silver Daggers and Robedoor. Scott W took some killer aerial footage of the entire battery in action (more video after the jump), while engineer Richard Rusincovitch made it all sound good.

Foot Village -- live on WFMU (recorded 5/14/08 broadcast 5/26/08 on Marty McSorley's show, eng.  Richard Rusincovitch)
1. Foot Village - TAKE (mp3)
2. Foot Village - Clubtraxxx (mp3)
3. Foot Village - Crybaby (mp3)
4. Foot Village - National Jamthumb (mp3)
5. Foot Village - I You We (mp3)
6. Foot Village - Protective Nourishment (mp3)

Live audio licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-Share Alike 3.0 license

more video and images of Foot Village live in WFMU's studio B -->

Great Moments in WFMU History #30

Hitman DJ - by Ken Freedman and Liz Berg

During the late '80s, WFMU had a DJ who worked as an underling for an extremely depressed man in a local scuba diving shop. The boss couldn’t bear to commit suicide, but had been searching for someone to take care of the task for him. He offered the DJ $10,000 and a new Mercedes in exchange for ending his misery. The DJ, who had once chased another WFMU staffer through the Upsala College parking lot with a knife in his hand, accepted the offer. After the compensation had been dealt with, the two drove out to a wooded area in Western New Jersey, where the DJ shot and killed his boss, turning himself in to the authorities shortly thereafter. He served about 5 years in jail.

Artwork by Takeshi Tadatsu

Millie Jackson's Indecent Symphony (video)

Millie Jackson is not only famous for her award-winning album covers, but probably also holds the record for the most FCC violations in a single symphony. Here is a live version from 1984.

YouTube link is here.

Archie Club News #19

Throughout the nineteen sixties, seventies and eighties, most issues of Archie Comics featured a two-page spread titled Archie Club News. The banner at the top of the page announced, "ARCHIE CLUB MEMBERS send in your reports and be eligible to win cash prizes in the Archie Series Magazines." The results of this venture were generally irrelevant notes sent in like, "Dear Archie, I have something to say about pollution." Often what was sent in appeared to be part of a class project. Elementary school children were in the process of learning how to write letters and encouraged by a teacher to send something Riverdale way. Sometimes the letters were weird or even profound and other times prophetic or just silly. This one is obviously heartfelt but also downright sad. It originally appeared in Archie #144, March 1964:

Dear Archie:

My father, brother and myself go places all the time. (My mother is deceased.) Last summer we went to the Seattle World's Fair ... A couple of years ago we visited our grandmother in Boston ... Every few years we visit her ...

... As you've probably guessed, I love horses and horseback riding. That as you can see is my hobby. You'll probably laugh at what I'm going to say next as everybody else does. I'm trying to save money for a horse. It will take me some time at the rate I'm going. But my father doesn't think it's as stupid as everybody else does. He even agreed to pay half. I'm only going to save about $150. I'm only 10 years old, but I believe strongly in God. I know that He will help me. 

I only have one pet, a kitten. I won't have him for long either. My father does not like pets. Everyone we have ever had has died. I guess that's why he doesn't like pets.

First that I can remember, we had a dog. He was black & white, so we named him Frosty Midnight. He was playing and he swallowed a rubber ball and died.

Sarah Batchelder
242 E. Home Street
Long Beach, Calif.

Sarah's letter won first prize of five dollars for this issue.