Earlier this week, a little bit of awesome turned up in my inbox, via the South Florida Sun-Sentinel of all places. This gallery of retro cereal boxes is fun not necessarily because it's a reminder of all the crap I used to eat, but rather because it nicely highlights all the cereal ideas and kooky design ideas that didn't quite work.






UPDATE: More on King Vitaman after the jump.
And while we're at it, how about a little musical homage to Alpha-Bits with the Jackson 5.
Update:
Some chat in the comments about King Vitaman inspired me to hunt down a bit more. For instance, the evolution of his packaging goes something like this:





And who can forget those classic animated commercials, produced by Jay Ward and featuring the talents of the Rocky and Bullwinke gang.
And for a huge selection of more classic cereal boxes also check out this site: The Imaginary World.
And finally, King Vitaman is still being produced (as is the comments-mentioned Quisp). It can be hard to track down, but I've found that most fun hard-to-find foods can be had, where else, on the internet. Visit Hometown Favorites, for still produced classic cereals, candies, and other grocery items.
crazy cow, we have that now in our beef! man, kellogg's OK's are like a scottish tom of finland...tom of scotland?
Posted by: zom | June 28, 2008 at 04:22 PM
I think the artist was just phoning it in on "Wackies."
Posted by: Dale Hazelton | June 28, 2008 at 05:54 PM
Anyone remember Concentrate? (I think it was called). It came in a little gold box with a big "C" on it. That was pretty much what we were allowed to eat, sometimes Alpen or Raisin Bran too.
I had a younger brother who believed the story about Mikey from Life Cereal dying from mixing Pop Rocks and Pepsi. But he went one better; I don't know who told him but he sincerely believed for a while that in recognition of Mikey's demise that Life Cereal was going to change its name to "Death Cereal."
Posted by: bartleby | June 28, 2008 at 09:30 PM
King Vitamin didn't quite work? Pshaw!
Posted by: Jim | June 28, 2008 at 10:03 PM
"Crunchy Loggs" is the only cereal that seems remotely gross
Posted by: JMet | June 28, 2008 at 10:41 PM
Geez! I remember King Vitamin commercials like it was yesterday!
"King Vitamin! Have breakfast with the King!" Sounds kind of Christian, now....
Posted by: rich | June 28, 2008 at 11:12 PM
I'm still not 100% sure that these aren't Wacky Packages!!
Posted by: Listener James from Westwood | June 28, 2008 at 11:13 PM
JMet: That's King VitaMAN. Which is maybe Christianity with a touch of Nietzsche.
Posted by: Account Deleted | June 29, 2008 at 12:14 AM
Equally amusing is http://metalmisfit.wordpress.com/2007/04/09/cereals-from-beyond-2/ "Cereals From Beyond." I remember "Ice Cream Cones" from the mid-1980s, and they weren't very good. The ads on TV insisted that I'd love 'em 'cause I was a kid. But the TV fibbed. Big time.
Posted by: Bren C. | June 29, 2008 at 02:12 AM
fruity yummy mummy replaced fruit brute in the monster's of breakfast (count chocula,frankenberry,boo-berry)...
fruit brute was way cooler...
Posted by: sluggoslade | June 29, 2008 at 03:20 AM
recently in the store i found a reproduction box of quisp. it was delicious, and not as stale as if it had been saved from the 60s!
Posted by: hana | June 29, 2008 at 09:29 AM
i knew a guy who knew the whole jingle for King Vitaman cereal- music and lyrics- I have yet to find it anywhere- but he knew the whole thing. musical encyclopedia that guy was....
Posted by: brianne | June 29, 2008 at 12:29 PM
Quisp never actually completely went away.
Posted by: toober | June 29, 2008 at 12:32 PM
Quisp never actually completely went away.
Posted by: toober | June 29, 2008 at 12:34 PM
One box contains Mr. T stickers.
One box contains Safety Sign stickers.
One marketer gets a raise and bonus.
One marketer gets a pink slip.
Posted by: toober | June 29, 2008 at 01:21 PM
Sir Grapefellow - disgusting cereal, but I had the balloon-powered air car for years.
Vanilly Crunch - I thought the whale was stupid, but I recall having the cereal at a friend's house and it was great.
Grins & Smiles & Giggles & Laughs - I think it was called something else at some point (maybe just in my area), but I do remember the cool walking machine toy.
King Vitaman - talked mom into getting it for the Royal Racing Coach which was awesome!
Hoots - no toy, but the cereal was fantastic! (Beat Cocoa Puffs by a mile.)
Quisp - never tried it, but apparently Quaker still makes it and there is a huge cult of Quisp lovers who order it online.
Posted by: Derek | June 29, 2008 at 01:26 PM
I ate Quisp as a kid and liked it. But then they stopped selling it, and somehow or another I went on with my life.
Posted by: Ungar Rez | June 29, 2008 at 05:25 PM
"Grins & Smiles & Giggles & Laughs" sounds like the title of any 1970s summer replacement TV comedy series.
Posted by: AndrewJ | June 29, 2008 at 07:40 PM
What about Freakies?
Posted by: rachel | June 29, 2008 at 10:24 PM
Wow. I would TOTALLY 'do' the Kellogg's OK Oats Guy. HOT daddy alert...
Posted by: Saskplanner | June 30, 2008 at 01:22 AM
Check out the give-away on the box of Crunchy Logs. It's an owl calculator. I had that calculator for years but could never remember where it came from. Now I know. I gotta have a talk with my parents to ask them why they let me eat Crunchy Logs.
Guess that explains a lot.
Posted by: Christopher | June 30, 2008 at 02:13 AM
man, i had forgotten about sir grapefellow...i too had the balloon racer. it was a nasty bowlful of blue goo.
fruit brute.....i still have the glow in the dark lightswitch sticker!
Posted by: scooter jay | June 30, 2008 at 11:39 AM
The third King Vitaman looks like a pedophile...just too eager to spoon feed someones child.
I have four boxes of Addams Family cereal, with different character flashlights shrink wrapped to each box. Anyone want to make me an offer? 15 year old cereal can't be THAT bad....
Posted by: Dale Hazelton | June 30, 2008 at 08:41 PM
I remember saving the box tops and waiting the eternal 6-8 weeks to get my Quake doll. I recall there were 2 versions of Quake. The first was a beefy, muscular guy (like my doll) and then a more slimmed-down, somewhat metrosexual looking version.
Posted by: drewo | June 30, 2008 at 10:14 PM
King Vitaman was the BEST. Closest thing taste-wise is Capn Crunch, but King Vitaman had a better texture.
Posted by: jenjen | June 30, 2008 at 10:26 PM