WFMU's Beware of the Blog

The Cold Hard Facts Of Life (MP3s)

Since there's no such thing as too much overkill, today we're shining the spotlight on a ridiculously generous sampling of The Cold Hard Facts Of Life, one of singer and songwriter Bill Anderson's most expertly-crafted tunes.   Sure, Anderson wrote a plethora of great songs, but for my money none of them tops The Cold Hard Facts Of Life.  Originally recorded by Porter Wagoner in late 1966, the song tells the story of a hapless chump who returns home from a business trip a few days earlier than expected only to find his wife gettin' busy with another dude, a discovery that prompts him to guzzle some booze and reach vengefully for a big sharp knife.  Whenever people discuss their all-time favorite cheating songs, The Cold Hard Facts Of Life is sure to be prominently mentioned. 

The Cold Hard Facts Of Life is not only a great song title, it also functions as a fun and memorable catchphrase that can be employed anytime somebody learns a bitter lesson the hard way.  For instance, if you're an experienced NYC bicyclist and your ride gets stolen when you let a complete stranger "borrow" your bike so he can assess how it handles, it could (and should) be said that you learned the cold hard facts of life.

Porter Wagoner  -  The Cold Hard Facts Of Life  (3:12)

Ernest Tubb  -  The Cold Hard Facts Of Life  (3:20)

Bill Anderson  -  The Cold Hard Facts Of Life  (3:44)

Stonewall Jackson  -  The Cold Hard Facts Of Life  (3:22)

Johnny Darrell  -  The Cold Hard Facts Of Life  (3:12)

Ferlin Husky  -  The Cold Hard Facts Of Life  (3:05)

WFMU: endorsed by El Vez

   

Hey, I just happened to be at the El Vez show last week, so I got a WFMU endorsement by the #1 Mexican Elvis impersonator. And also got a very patriotic WFMU T-shirt picture, to boot. Mr. Vez is finishing up his "El Vez For Prez 2008" tour in the next couple of weeks, and it's a real treat; you get the usual El Vez repertoire ("Blue Suede Shoes" recast as "Huaraches Azules", "Suspicious Minds" rewritten as "Immigration Time"), as well as some interesting new tunes (Dylan's "Ballad of a Thin Man" rewritten with "Mr. Bush" replacing "Mr. Jones"; The Velvet Underground's "Run Run Run" written from the viewpoint of the current Democratic and Republican candidates). The musical references and re-worked tunes come flying faster than the samples at a Girl Talk concert, and the choreography is much better. Check the El Vez Website for tour dates.

LOLBush... at the Olympics.

More here...

Thanks to Brian for the link...

Worst? Logo? Ever?

    The Unfair Park blog at The Dallas Observer has unveiled/uncovered the city's new logo design for their upcoming "1st Annual Hip Hop for HIV Concert." Unbelievable?
    They ask, "How many things can you find that are wrong and/or disturbing and/or disturbingly wrong with said image?"

Tiny Art Director

Pity the poor illustrator. He just wants to paint some robots, some rocket ships, maybe a couple of monsters. He finally finds a live human female to impregnate, and they produce a girl … or a boy … or, the shocking third alternative, A TINY ART DIRECTOR.

Peter Evans/Tom Blancarte/Brandon Seabrook Live on WFMU

Trumpet/bass/guitar (banjo) configuration stopped by WFMU to record a blistering set for the Long Rally.  This group is 3/4 of the Peter Evans Quartet and also an expanded version of the dense improv duo Spärks (Tom Blancarte/Peter Evans), currently celebrating a new record on the Portuguese Creative Sources label.  Catch the Peter Evans Quartet live at DJ Bethany's Stochastic Brooklyn show at Barbes on August 20th, and check for the amazing 4tet record out on the Firehouse 12 label.  They were kind enough to play both Spärks material (see the Spärks score below) and PE 4tet material, Spärks being an improv explosion and the Peter Evans Quartet a kaleidoscopic reconstruction of jazz tunes.  Engineered by Glenn Luttman.

Peter Evans/Tom Blancarte/Brandon Seabrook - Concerto for Brandon Seabrook and Sparks
Peter Evans/Tom Blancarte/Brandon Seabrook - a) The Christmas Song b) Heaven c) Slow 3/4 Song

 

Noah Presents Brain Suck

Mysterious little artyfact originally released in 1969.  Can't really tell you anything more about this, Noah's only known LP called Brain Suck.  Somewhere near the cutting edge for that year though, this LP reaches all over the globe in terms of heavy psych and has plenty of (often) successful proggy explorations.  Right, like, lots of pentatonic jams by a would-be Hendrix.  You know you like it though.

Kudos to mysteryposter for the exhumation.

Why Should I Care?

Brain Suck/Goodbye Earth

We Wanna Be Free

I Wish I Knew My Name

The Other Side Medley

But then again, you're probably better off just listening to Downer Rock Genocide.

September: WFMU at ISSUE Project Room

WFMU is pleased to announce that we are curating weekends at Brooklyn's ISSUE Project Room this September. Each night, a different WFMU DJ will spin records in between performances by artists of their choosing. Here's what we've got so far, with more details on the way:

Fri Sept 5: Dan Bodah presents Bing & Ruth + The Pyramid Scheme Trio

Sat Sept 6: Irene Trudel, presents David Garland + Pete Galub, Greta Gertler, and Friends + Noa Babayof

Fri Sept 12: Kurt Gottschalk presents A Neil Peart Birthday Celebration w/ Brown Wing Overdrive + Sean Meehan / David Watson duo

Sat Sept 13: Tony Coulter presents Sterling Basement (John Roach, John Hudak, Shawn Onsgard, Matthew Rohrer) performing "Songs of the Gowanus Canal" + If, Bwana and Michael Peters, sounds and texts

Fri Sept 19: Bethany presents Bloodcount + Normal Love + New York Miniaturist Ensemble

Sat Sept 20: Brian Turner presents Cooper-Moore Solo / Music: Old and New Paths + Ryan Jewell & Greg Kelley Duo + Heathen Shame (Wayne Rogers, Kate Village and Greg Kelley)

Fri Sept 26: Fabio presents Ken Montgomery and Michael Evans duo + Lary Seven film projection + Kenta Nagai

Sat Sept 27: Trouble presents Lights + Teeth Mountain

WFMU couldn't be more excited to be collaborating with this top notch not-for-profit performance space. IPR "provides an open and versatile environment where both established and emerging artists can conduct, exhibit and perform new and site-specific work according to their respective visions. Through an evolving collaboration with curators, artists and educators, ISSUE Project Room fosters a wide-range of artistic projects that challenge and expand conventional practices in art."

IPR lives up to their lofty mission with an exciting events calendar, a 15-channel speaker system, and an art advisory board that includes William Basinski, Rhys Chatham, Tony Conrad, David Grubbs, Elliott Sharp, and Moby. This year, IPR was awarded a a city-sponsored 20-year lease on a 5000 sq ft landmark theater in downtown Brooklyn. You can read more about the move and help make it possible here.

These WFMU-curated nights will take place at IPR's current spot on the 3rd floor of the (OA) Can Factory in Carroll Gardens. ISSUE Project Room is located at 232 3rd Street, Brooklyn, NY 11215. Stay tuned to WFMU, Beware of the Blog, and ISSUE Project Room for more details!

Prgrammer's Digest, July 30, 1973 (MP3s)

1. Intro (1:11)
2. Little Things Mean a Lot (2:43)
3. Yesterday and Today (10:56)
4. Sounds of the Secondary (7:43)
5. Radio Looks at Radio (5:10)
6. Profile WAYS Charlotte (8:14)
7. Around the Country (10:10)
8. "P" Is for Production (10:06)
9. Close (1:19)

Here's a record that survives because there's a picture of The Beatles on the cover. There's no Beatles on the record, save for some solo McCartney, but what is here is fantastic, especially if you're a fan of the golden age of freeform radio.

Programmer's Digest, published 26 times a year, was an audio magazine for radio management that followed the "learn by listening" model. Each issue contained a series of air checks and edited examples compiled from radio stations around the United States.

The timing here is everything. The early '70s were tumultuous in radio. Freeform stations were battling Top 40 formatted stations for listeners. DJs were evolving from announcers to personalities. Rock and roll had morphed from radio-friendly singles to lengthy album tracks that gave music and programming directors fits. Rock as a whole was losing ground to adult contemporary in the precious Arbitrons, leaving many stations struggling to find an identity.

High Fidel-ity (MP3s)

Back in February, when Fidel Castro resigned the presidency of Cuba, the New York Times ran a nice piece on WFMU after Dave the Spazz feted the event by spinning Jay Chevalier's "Castro Rock" on his radio show. (Click to hear it, below.) Being that today is el Comandante's 82nd birthday, please join me, won't you, in belting out a rousing rendition of "¡Feliz Cumpleaños!" Hey, he may actually still be alive!

When you're done singing, please take time to enjoy these topical tunes:

Jay Chevalier & the Moon Men: Castro Rock (MP3)
The Skatalites: Fidel Castro (MP3)
Charlie Stewart & the Gem Tones: Hey! Castro (MP3)
Jackie McLean: Fidel (MP3)
Conjunto Bernal: Fidel Castro Polka (MP3)
Gene Freeman: Fidel Castro
Jacques Coursil: Fidel (MP3)

Monotonix live at WFMU (video)

Michael R. of videothing.com just posted some nutty footage of Monotonix playing live at WFMU on July 16th. Witness the band in all of its shirtless glory:

Monotonix will be back to play at this year's WFMU Record Fair on Sunday October 26 at the Metropolitan Pavilion. Stay tuned for more updates on the Record Fair as we get closer to the date!

Fake Beatles No. 16: Plunder From Down Under

In June 1964, the Beatles flew into Australia for a tour that turned the island continent Down Under upside down (which means they managed to flip it right side up, i suppose — oh, never mind). If, during the preceding February, the Fab Four hit America like a hurricane, now, in the Antipodes, they struck like a monsoon. Not long after John, Paul, George and Jimmy (Jimmy?! Yes, that's right, Jimmy — but that's another story) touched down at a rainy Sydney airport, they were greeted by hundreds of thousands of Australian fans — many of whom were recent emigres from the U.K. Several of these newly patriated Beatles-smitten folk, being equipped with a fair amount of musical ability and, more important, a bona fide British accent, fashioned Fake Beatles groups of their very own. Here are some of the Aussies and Kiwis who kept the flame burning once the Beatles high-tailed it back to Old Blighty. [All songs MP3]

The Twilights: "If She Finds Out" Fake Beatling would come naturally to this Adelaide combo, which had as its two lead singers the English-born Glenn Shorrock and an Irishman fortuitously named Paddy McCartney. When not faking the Fab, as in this 1965 single, they also performed Beatled-up soul songs and versions of Hollies album tracks. Shorrock later made a mint as the frontman for late-'70s soft rock sensations the Little River Band.

The Allusions: "The Dancer" Released in 1966, this Sydney quintet's tune sounded as if it came straight from 1964. Specifically, it could have come right off A Hard Day's Night. More specifically, it kinda did, as the song is a dead ringer for "I'm Happy Just to Dance With You," except with Michael Morris' Macca-ish vocals standing in for George's adenoidal lead.

The Easybeats: "What About Our Love" and "Then I'll Tell You Goodbye" Most famous for their international smash "Friday on My Mind," these expats from Britain and the Netherlands often displayed a more rough-hewn sound, as heard on "Women (Make You Feel Alright)," which bears a keen resemblance to "I Wanna Be Your Man." There was even an actual Liverpudlian in the band, Snowy Fleet, who had previously played drums with Merseybeat combo the Mojos ("Everything's Alright"). This brace of bogus Beatleosity came from the Easybeats' second LP, It's 2 Easy, from 1966.

Kurt Vile live on WFMU (mp3s)

Philly's "Constant Hitmaker" Kurt Vile brought a couple guitars, a banjo, a delay pedal, and a trusted microphone to the WFMU studios earlier this month. He played a few new tunes and a few from Constant Hitmaker (Gulcher), which has been one of my favorite albums of the year. I'm not alone -- Mike Lupica picked these "immediately appealing bedroom recordings" in Dusted's Mid-Year Roundup, citing their "fuzzed out melancholia that somehow invokes the spirit of Lee Hazlewood at his best." This stripped-down solo set -- without the multitracked synth, drum machine, and heady loops -- highlighted the darker aspects of Vile's songwriting, with some Songs-of-Leonard-Cohen-y chills.

The live set aired on this week's episode of Talk's Cheap, and was engineered by Trent Wolbe on 8/3/08.
[Talk's Cheap playlist and archive]
Kurt Vile - It's Alright (mp3), Space Forklift (mp3), I Wanted Everything (mp3), Classic Rock in Spring (mp3), Nicotine Blues (mp3)

Kurt Vile is currently on tour, making his European debut, backed by his band The Violators and their multiple floor tom attack. Vile's supporting (and also playing guitar in) The War on Drugs, who'll be playing Beirut Lebanon of all places. Vile's carrying a limited edition tour EP, and a new Richie Records release is on the way.

these live recordings are shared under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 United States license

Plan B

One Day, Three Boadrums

Friday was 8/8/8, a day I and many other slaves to the freakish rhythm had been waiting for for a year and a month - the sequel to Boredoms' 77BOADRUM, 88BOADRUM.  88 drummers performing in a spiral around a psychedelic center stage: this year, Boredoms held court at the La Brea Tar Pits in Los Angeles while Brooklyn's Gang Gang Dance did their own version on the Williamsburg waterfront.

Nothing surprising to report, really: while the whole Brooklyn production was predictably spectacular, it would have been otherworldly mindblowing with an insane dreadlocked visionary from another planet leading the spiral by screaming in tongues and smacking a seven-necked guitar with a trident in front of a full-size diorama of baby mammoths sinking into lakes of oil in the middle of Los Angeles, instead of a regular ol' Williamsburg dude hitting electronic drum pads in front of the regular ol' East River.

The biggest story of the day, though, was that both versions of 88BOADRUM got they asses boadrummed hard on a very large scale by these mofos in Beijing.  Turns out China can pour more money into production than Boadrum sponsor Nike Sportswear can.

Here's hoping Boredoms can get their hands on some galaxy-sized money for 9/9/9.

Seriously, if you didn't see the opening ceremonies, you owe it to yourself to check them out.  I know you'll like it.  To watch a highlight reel, go here and install Microsoft's annoying but gorgeous new video player, Silverlight.  (All the Youtube clips have been pulled)

For photos and video of the Williamsburg version of 88BOADRUM, go here.  For photos and video of the LAX version, go here (thanks Fogindex).

WFMU Radio Greats Weekend: Archives

If you missed any part of WFMU Radio Greats Weekend, the archives are all up and awaiting your listening pleasure!

The weekend of August 9th, legendary WFMU DJs from years past drop by to help celebrate 50 years on the air. Special guests included Steinski, Danny Fields, Vin Scelsa, Hova & Belinda, R. Stevie Moore, The Hound, Wildgirl, Meredith, David Newgarden, Nicholas Hill, William Berger, Neal Adams, Mark Allen, Douglas Wolk, Stork, Mark Allen, John Schnall, Bart Plantenga plus surprise guests and rare airchecks. More info and archive links below. (Read more)

The Three Little Pigs

Today's post is a shot in the dark, a hope that somehow, someone who reads this blog had this record as a child, has this record and/or knows who the performer(s) is or are. This track may not be for everyone, but I suspect there are some for whom it will resonate as it does for me.

In 1964, when I was four, my mother spent a few days putting over three hours of her children's (and her own) favorite records onto a reel of tape for posterity. My brother and sister are older than me, so these records ranged from 78's from the early '50's, to multiple tracks off of albums from the early '60's.

The tape contains everything from the usual subjects ("Witch Doctor", Spike Jones records) to more obscure titles (a Children's Records Guild 78 of "The Little Gray Ponies" by Tom Glazer), to virtually unknown records ("The Baby Babble Record", which I previously shared in the first 365 days project).

I digitized this tape a few years ago, and when I went to seek out the artists' names, I was not surprised to find that, with my obsessive collecting and keeping of records, I still owned nearly all of the records contained on the tape. The record I couldn't find in my collection was the one I most wanted to know more about. It's a version of "The Three Little Pigs", clearly from a 5" 78 (you can hear the break where the record is started over on the B-side at the 95 second point). I don't believe it's a "Little Golden Record", based on the searching I've already done, but I could be wrong.

I can't get over this record, and would love to hear other recordings featuring the same singer. I don't think this was a favorite of mine when I was little, but as an adult, it captivates me. I love the high-quality musical arrangement (try finding anything this complex and well played on a children's record from the last 40 years), and I am completely in love with the voice of the woman who sings most of the song. Her performance conveys an breathtaking and wonderful degree of emotion - for example, on the words strong and big" just after the halfway point, and on the words "the walls were strong" near the end of the piece, she is as good a storyteller as I've ever heard.

Some people cry at sad movies. This is the sort of thing that makes me tear up - a sweet, innocent (and, by the way, perfectly arranged and performed) record. I am in awe of this singer's ability to put such feeling into such simple words from such a simple story.

Please excuse the poor sound quality - this record had been much loved by young hands, for well over a decade, by the time it was copied to tape

In three years of looking, I've been unable to determine anything about this record. If anyone knows, or thinks they know, who this is, I'd be forever in your debt.

Bob Purse

Unknown Artist - The Three Little Pigs (MP3)

Altered States and Otomo Yoshihide (MP3s)

Altered States are a Japanese power trio formed in 1989, consisting of Kazuhisa Uchihashi on guitar, Mitsuru Natsuno on bass, and Yasuhiro Yoshigaki on drums. Starting as a jazz trio, they soon left the conventions of the genre behind and ventured out into avant-rock territory. In 1993 they played some gigs with turntablist Otomo Yoshihide in Lithuania and Estonia, resulting in the album Lithuania and Estonia Live, released on Trigram in 1994. All Altered States albums from the 90s went out of print, and this one even seems to be absent from the blogosphere. It is great music, though, so here it is in MP3:

Motif B | Chain Reaction | Improvisation #1 | Improvisation #2 | Motif B - Improvisation #3 | Improvisation #4 | Ground Zero | Arashigaoka | Lithuania Mix

I'll throw in some bonus tracks from two great Altered States studio albums. They are a little less improvised and slightly more polished and accessible, in a way...

From Mosaic (God Mountain 1995), featuring tons of guest musicians: Issai-Kai-Ku (with Koichi Makigami on vocals) | Motif A (with Junji Hirose on tenor sax)

From Plays Standards (Station Kids 1999), revisiting their Jazz roots: Blue Moon | A Night In Tunisia

From 1994 on, the three members of Altered States were permanent members of Otomo Yoshihide's project Ground Zero. Ground Zero also recorded an album called Plays Standards, from which you can hear a Victor Jara cover as part of a highly controversial earlier post of mine.

YouTube doesn't disappoint either: Altered States live, crappy sound and video quality, but still worth watching: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3. I don't know Japanese, but I assume this is a relatively recent performance.

Radio Greats Sunday Style

Our operators are standing by to take your calls for DJ Steinski.  Dial 1-201-209-9368 or post a comment on our comment line by clicking on see the playlist.

Voice Mail - (Sugar Hill Suite) Mp3

Is this a Coen Brothers film?

Dear Coens, here is my pitch for your next film:

A young cheerleader from North Carolina moves to Wyoming where she wins the state beauty pageant. Then she enrolls in graduate school at Brigham Young University where she becomes obsessed with Wayne Osmond (the second oldest Osmond). Wayne rejects her, but happiness is around the corner because she meets and falls in love with a 19-year-old Mormon classmate. They have a lot of sex. Alas, the Mormon is shamed by their sex-before-marriage and runs away to do missionary work. He leaves no forwarding address.

Our heroine then hires a pair of kooky private detectives who track the Mormon to London. She heads to the U.K., and with the help of a dim-witted accomplice, drugs the Mormon with Chloroform, kidnaps him, and scurries him away to a secluded farmhouse. There she ties the Mormon to a bed with furry handcuffs, and uses scriptures to beg him to marry her. When that doesn't work, she tries lots of sex. But the Mormon escapes, and when the police track down our heroine, she declares innocence, claiming that the Mormon could only orgasm while tied up. She sounds completely nutty in court  - "I loved him so much that I would have skied down Mount Everest in the nude with a carnation up my nose if he asked me to." - but has a Southern Belle style that makes the media go crazy for her.

Just before the formal trial, our heroine jumps bail and escapes to Canada with her accomplice. They are disguised as a pair of deaf-mute "mime artists".  She then hides out in Atlanta for a time disguised as a nun and she starts to pose nude for pin-up magazines.

Returning to Utah several years later, our heroine tries to kidnap the Mormon but fails. She has to jump bail again and flee the state.

Retiring to her home town, our heroine lives a quiet life raising Pit Bulls and freaking out the neighbors with outbursts and random threats. She's fallen into ill health and uses one of the dogs to pull her around in her wheelchair (back story: she liberated him from doggy death row after he attacked a pair of joggers). One day a strange dog attacks her and almost bites off her arm, but her prized Pit Bull Booger fights him off. Not long afterwards, Booger dies. Devastated, our heroine keeps one of his ears. Two years later, she uses her life savings and pays Korean scientists $53K to clone her dog. They give her a discounted rate because he was a hero. (Or was he?)

Our heroine proudly publicizes the story of Booger and her puppy clones, but is almost instantly recognized for her past indiscretions (using an alias that is merely her middle name was perhaps unwise). At first, she threatens a $10M libel suit on anyone who claims she is the same woman of sex scandal fame, but a day later she admits that it is indeed her. In regards to the Mormon, she still sounds nutty: "All I really wanted to do was see his blond little babies running around my home."

Yes, this pitch is actually the true story of Joyce Bernann McKinney. So many twists and turns, it's no wonder the tabloids can't control themselves. The movie version is going to be fantastic. Any casting ideas?

News reports: Background story, denial, admission. And don't miss the classic pulp trash book: Joyce McKinney and the Manacled Mormon.