The official 2012 Olympic mascots have finally been let out of their cages. Yesterday a bunch of London students became the first children to be 'touched' by these oversized perverted teletubbies with scary names: Wenlock, and Mandeville.
Olympic mascots by their nature invite criticism, detractors often use the silly characters to make serious statements about the host country. China went through hell with it's 2008 mascots, the characters were appropriated by many foreign and domestic protest groups. The Chinese government got so red in the face over the trouble, they even changed the name from friendlies to fuwa.
Thus it is impossible not to look at these monstrosities and wonder about possible connections to the new coalition government. Was there a last minute mascot intervention at 10 Downing Street? Was one semi non-retarded creature split in two? Is the giant blue crotch more Cameron or Clegg? And just as the Chinese forced Fuwa designer Han Meilin to incorporate the aims of the state into his creatures, are the giant eyeballs supposed to be friendly CCTV cameras?
The official origin story is of course much more Disney but I am not fooled!
***UPDATE*** This YouTube Vid suggests evidence of Free Masonry:
The logo on the breast plate of the orange one looks like Lisa Simpson orally servicing her brother. Easily worth the 8,000,000 pounds spent on design.
Posted by: K. | May 20, 2010 at 01:22 PM
looks like the Blue One went pee-pee in it's 'trousers'
Posted by: dave | May 20, 2010 at 01:47 PM
2 big ole one-eyed monsters.
Posted by: krebstar01 | May 20, 2010 at 02:23 PM
They're posed in front of a rainbow.
Safe to assume no one involved ever said, "let's try not to make this too gay." Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Posted by: j | May 20, 2010 at 02:30 PM
It isn't easy being a mascot...
http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/tue-june-13-2000/degeneres-fur-and-loathing
Posted by: Evan | May 20, 2010 at 02:31 PM
http://s2.b3ta.com/host/creative/46786/1274293406/Olympics2012.jpg
People are very very quick
Posted by: Colin the Culture Hunter | May 20, 2010 at 06:48 PM
DON'T BLINK
http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-173
Posted by: Elizabeth | May 20, 2010 at 08:18 PM
Does anyone else think of The Residents when looking at these characters?
Posted by: Chris | May 20, 2010 at 11:50 PM
London, being the most watched city in the world (cameras everywhere) would employ two large eyes as its Olympic mascot. Fitting.
Posted by: J | May 21, 2010 at 01:26 PM
I'm waiting for Dave E-M-O-R-Y 's report on this.
Posted by: Keith | May 23, 2010 at 05:46 PM
More Olympic weirdness- Danny "Trainspotting" Boyle has been chosen as the Artistic Director
FANTASTIC
Posted by: Colin The Culture Hunter | June 17, 2010 at 09:34 AM